Keeping Your Head Up
by hanbefanficin
Summary: "All I can do to keep you safe is hold you close 'til you can breathe on your own." A/U: Arizona Robbins has always had a tough life. That hasn't stopped her from doing everything possible to fulfil her dream of becoming an M.D. However, one indescribably horrifying night could ruin everything for her. Trigger warning: sexual assault. *COMPLETE* Sequel in-progress...
1. Part 1

**Part One**

_Arizona_  
It's the same routine every Thursday, Friday and Saturday night. I stand in front of a full-length mirror, psyching myself up to get out there and do my job. My face is done up; the smoky eyeshadow, bronzed cheeks and pink lip gloss combination still feels so unnatural to me. I'm comfortable with my long, curled hair. This is how I'd usually wear it. It's what I'm wearing, or lack of what I'm wearing, that bothers me the most; cobalt blue lingerie that leaves very little to the imagination. The black stilettos I'm wearing make everything in my body tight.

"Love that colour on you, Zo," Teddy greets me with a gentle, backhanded slap to my ass as she makes her way passed me. She stands in front of the mirror next to me, adjusting her own dusty pink bra to accentuate her cleavage. Having my best friend here with me makes me feel somewhat better. We were lucky to find each other in this shit situation. "What time you home?" She asks, reapplying the lipstick that matches her underwear.

"I'm here 'til closing," I sigh out, dejectedly. "What about you?"

"I get off at 1," she says, turning to face me. "I'll leave your dinner in the oven," she says, quickly. She always insists on cooking when I work late, and vice versa.

"Thanks, you're the best," I smile at her before turning to head out of the dressing room. "I'll see you later."

"Be safe, Zo," she calls out, caringly.

"You, too."

As I walk into the dark club lit only by neon signs, I see that one of my regular clients is here already watching Jess dance on stage with a near-empty whiskey tumbler in his hand. He's a smug, high-powered businessman in his early thirties. Married. Thinks he owns the place because he brings in plenty of money. He's a lot more handsy than the other men I dance for. I try to avoid him and go to the bar to pick up a tray of shots. I start to circulate the room, offering the spirits around. It's not long before I feel his palm rest on my lower back. I plaster a fake smile on my face and turn to face him.

"Good evening, Mr Cohen," I say, with false enthusiasm. He doesn't say anything, he simply slides a fifty into my bra. I already know what he wants. I put the tray on the nearest table and take his hand, leading him towards the Champagne room for a private dance behind the curtains. He sits down and I straddle him. As I begin rolling my hips to the music, he grabs my ass and grunts. I keep my hands tangled up in my own hair so I'm not tempted to slap him away. My body moves up and down above him and it becomes apparent that his eyes are fixed to my tits. He slides another fifty into my underwear.

"Lose the bra," he demands. Feeling sick to my stomach, I reach around with one hand, unclasp it and let it fall to the floor. I get through it by telling myself this is as far as it can go. He can look, but he can't touch. And, he can't make me take off my underwear. Those are the club rules... most of the time. I suffer through the dance for a few more minutes before the music comes to an end. I give him a phoney smile and get off his lap to retrieve my bra. I put it back on quickly and shove the money into one of its cups. "The dance was great," he says, sleazily, making me spin around to face him. "But, you know, it's left me a little... tense." There's a dark gleam in his eye as he stands and invades my personal space. I don't like where this is going. "What will you do for a grand?"

"I-It's not that kind of place, sir," I stutter, but try to remain professional. "I'm here to dance. That's it." I say, holding my hands up. He steps closer to me and grabs my arm tightly. He's so strong that he could snap it in half with one swift motion if he wanted to.

"Listen, you little bitch," his tone turns aggressive. "You gave me this," he says, referring to his erection. "Now you're going to get rid of it for me!" As he pushes me into the back wall, I feel it through his suit trousers. Tears sting my eyes and a lump forms in my throat. What the hell is he going to make me do?

"Get off of her!" I hear Teddy's voice infiltrate the room. She grabs one of his arms to try and get him away from me but he shoves her to the floor with it.

"Teddy!" I cry out. His grip on me is looser in all the commotion and I manage to wriggle out of his hand, rushing to my friend's side. "Are you alright?" I ask, my voice wavering.

"Yeah," She says, quickly. Cohen is already rushing out of the room, outraged that he hasn't got what he wanted. "I heard that asshole shouting, and thought you might need a little help," she explains. "Did he hurt you?"

"Those women are fucking nuts!" We hear him shout. It's closely followed by Jerry, the club owner, grovelling after him.

"Mr Cohen, I am so sorry. Your drinks are free for the rest of the night."

"My arm's going to be bruised, but I'm okay," I respond to her question, trying to ignore Jerry's pathetic pleas. "Please don't put yourself in danger like that again," I scold, gently, squeezing one of her hands with gratitude.

"We've got to look after each other," she says, as I help her back onto her feet.

"Robbins," Jerry's voice is sharp and angry when he enters the room. "What the fuck just happened?"

"He... he wanted more than a dance," I say, shakily.

"How much did he offer?" He asks, irritated. Is he fucking kidding?

"Hey! She needs to go home!" Teddy interjects, assertively. "He practically assaulted her."

"You don't fucking tell me how to manage my staff," he says, pointing in her face. "Get back out there _now_," he throws a thumb over his shoulder and Teddy growls out in frustration as she exits the room. "And, _you_..." He says, turning his attention back to me. "You know how much money that man brings in each month?" I shake my head and look at the floor. "If you're going to reject him, it needs to be done carefully. Don't let this happen again!"

...

The last customers left at 4am. It was a steady night. All in all, I got about $500 in tips. It went straight to Jerry of course. In approximately two months, I'll have paid off my debt to him. Then, I can start to pursue what I really want to do.

Currently, my biology degree is in a frame, leaning carelessly against a wall, gathering dust in the apartment being rented by Teddy and I. Soon, I'll be using it to get myself out of this city and into Johns Hopkins School of Medicine. That's the dream, anyway. Teddy already has her Medical Degree. She's just waiting on a position in the army. The thought of her going anywhere near a warzone chills me to my very core. Especially, after what happened to my brother...

As I step out of the club and into the street, I shake the thoughts from my head, pulling my black trench coat closer to my body. It's cold tonight, but my home isn't far from here; six blocks away. As I pace speedily towards my building, I check my phone to see a couple of messages from Teddy and a missed call from Nick.

A sudden gasp escapes my body as I'm dragged backwards into an alleyway. A muscly arm is snaked around my torso and a sharp blade sits threateningly under my chin.

This is it; these are my final moments.

"Don't... make... a sound," the deep voice says, pointedly. It's Cohen. He throws me to the floor and puts the knife in his belt before pinning both of my wrists down. I try and struggle out of his grasp but he's too strong.

"Help!" I scream out desperately, in an attempt to get the attention of anyone. But, there's no one around.

"What the fuck did I just say?" He says, his huge hand grabbing the bottom half of my face, covering my mouth and squeezing my jaw tightly. A muffled cry escapes my throat and my breathing becomes fast and erratic. He uses his other hand to undo the belt on my coat and then slides it up my thigh and under my dress. As he touches me, the first tears appear in my eyes. I close them, trying to stop them from spilling down my cheeks. The rest happens quickly; he tears my underwear off, unzips his pants and forces his way into me.

I shut down. I try not to feel it. I think of anywhere else I could be right now. I create vivid pictures in my head; a beach with perfect white sand, a meadow full of flowers, a lake of clear water surrounded by snow-topped mountains, an untouched forest in fall.

It doesn't work. I still feel every excruciating moment. Every unwelcome thrust of his hips, every dreadful grope of my body... I feel it. The sound of his satisfied grunting fills my ears and silent tears I'd been fighting start to roll down my cheek. His overwhelming aftershave makes me nauseous and I already know the terrible scent isn't going to leave me for the foreseeable future. I squeeze my eyes together tightly and pray to whatever's out there that this stops soon.

It feels like hours... Hours of shameful, power-hungry torture. When he finally stops, I can't move. It's as though he's paralysed me. I remain glued to the cold, stone floor until he picks me up and slams me into one of the walls.

"You tell anyone about this and I will kill you." I know this is a promise. He's got too much to lose; his company, his connections, his wife... God, his poor wife. I open my mouth to respond but no sound comes out. This visibly frustrates him. He starts shouting, but it falls on deaf ears. I can't concentrate on what he's saying. He gets angrier and more animated but I still can't focus on anything in the present... Until he grabs the knife and drives it into my stomach. My eyes are wide and my mouth hangs open as I try to deal with the pain. Just as quickly, he pulls it out of my body and runs out of sight. I clutch my stomach at the wound and apply as much pressure as I can. It's not enough to stop the inevitable. Soon, everything turns black.


	2. Part 2

**Part Two**

_Amelia_  
It's 5:28am and the sun is just starting to rise, creating an orange hue across Seattle; a beautiful morning for a run. Downtown is best for this; the party people are all still in bed. That's one of the reasons I chose to buy a penthouse around here. At times like this, it makes me feel like I have the whole town to myself.

I put my earphones in and select my running playlist. _Banquet_ by Bloc Party starts to blast into my ears and my pace falls in time with the music. The crisp spring air hits my face and fills my lungs. It washes away any lingering drowsiness.

This burst of exercise before work is perfect for me. It takes my mind away from any early morning substance cravings and allows me to focus on the day ahead.

I'm into the flow of my run when I'm stopped dead in my tracks by the most horrific sight. A blonde woman, early twenties, is lying unconscious in a pool of blood down an alleyway. She's in fetal position. Her coat lies open and her pulled-up dress just about covers her dignity. Torn underwear lies a few feet away from her. I run to her and fall to my knees, pressing two fingers to her jugular vein. Her pulse is very weak, but it's still there. I dial 911 and hold the phone in between my ear and my shoulder as I start to put her into the recovery position. Suddenly, I notice the stab wound on her stomach. I whip my jacket off and use it to apply the appropriate amount of pressure to it as I give the operator our location. They advise that they'll be there within three minutes. I hang up so I'm able to put all my energy into saving the woman in front of me.

Only now do I get the chance to study her tear-stained face. I recognise this woman; she lives in my building. Her name is Arizona... That's all I know about her. She seems like a sweet girl. She has a smile for everyone she encounters and I've spotted her helping out the older residents of the building a few times. I don't see her that often though. We must be running on different schedules.

I can hear sirens already. The ambulance can't be more than a couple of streets away.

"They're nearly here," I say, in case any part of her can hear me. "You're going to be okay."

There's no reaction. Her eyes remain shut tight and she's perfectly still. I scan her body for other injuries whilst I wait. There's a few bruises up and down her arms and a nasty gash above her eye. They're going to be busy in trauma.

About a minute later, the ambulance screeches to a halt outside the alleyway. Two paramedics rush out of the vehicle and straight towards us. I relay the details to them, but there's not much more they can do here. She's strapped to a gurney and rushed into the back of the ambulance. I follow them in and slam the doors behind us.

...

_Arizona_  
A high-pitched ringing fills my ears and confuses my mind. As I try to open my eyes, I'm blinded by fluorescent lighting. I close them again as I start to really feel the pain that I'm in. I ache from head to toe, but there are particularly strong pains in my stomach and vulva. A whimper escapes my throat as I blink a couple more times, trying to figure out what's happened and where I am. Then realisation hits me and I remember why I'm in so much pain. My breathing speeds up as my body automatically goes into 'fight or flight' mode. I can't move. Internally, I'm screaming but no sound leaves my mouth. I feel like I'm going to be sick...

"It's okay..." Though soft, the voice that's trying to reassure me makes me panic. "You're safe. You're at the hospital." A gentle hand touches my forearm. I open my eyes to look at a woman with blazing red hair. "Can you tell me your name?"

"Arizona..." I croak out. "Arizona Robbins."

"Arizona, I'm Dr Kepner," she says with a sweet smile. She's so composed that it makes me feel a little calmer. "I'll explain more about your situation a little later, but first we need you to rest for a while, okay?" I nod in agreement but I'm already worrying about how I'm going to pay for this hospital stay. "We couldn't trace your next of kin, is there anyone we can call for you?"

"Uh... I... Um..." Why am I struggling with this so much? I know what my answer is. "No."

"Are you sure? What about your family?" She asks. It wasn't meant to be an intrusive question. She's only trying to help.

"I... I don't have family," I reply, awkwardly.

"Oh... I'm sorry," she says, staring at me with sympathetic eyes. "Any friends we can contact?"

"No, I... I..." I'm trying to look for excuses. Truth is, the only person I'd be comfortable with being here is Teddy. But, I don't want her to freak out. She's got her own stuff going on.

"Teddy Altman!" My best friend appears as though my thoughts summoned her. "The answer to that question is_ always_ Teddy Altman!" She rushes me into an embrace. "God, I thought you were dead." She holds on tight to me but I can't respond. I'm completely numb. Dr Kepner slips out of the room to give us some privacy as Teddy holds me at arms-length and looks at me, seriously. "I've got half of Seattle out there looking for you, you know?" I give her a half-hearted smile and she already knows my head is elsewhere. "Are you alright?" She asks in a whisper.

"I'm fine," I try to convince her, but even I can hear the lack of sincerity in my voice.

"You don't look fine," she says, honestly. "What happened?"

"How did you know I was here?" I ask, ignoring her question.

"You know Amelia? The woman who lives in the penthouse?" She asks. I nod my head in response, remembering I'd introduced myself when she first moved in. "Well, it turns out she's a surgeon here. She came to our door to tell me you were here."

"Can she do that? Doesn't that break doctor-patient confidentiality?" Obviously, I'm not going to take this any further, but I feel like some rules have been broken here... Teddy shrugs at me.

"Well, it's a good job she did, otherwise you'd be here by yourself!" She scolds. "So, what happened?" She asks, again. Her question takes me back to the incident.

"I- um-" I struggle with what I'm supposed to say. I can't tell her everything - she'll kill him. Or, he'll kill me. "I was... attacked and... stabbed."

"Stabbed?" Her eyes fill with tears. It's probably a good job I didn't tell her the rest. She looks to me for answers, but I don't provide her with any. As if on cue, the wound in my stomach begins to throb. I grit my teeth and swallow down the pain as my hand automatically moves to cover it. I feel her eyes follow my every motion. When I look up at her, I notice they've turned dark. "Who did this to you?"

"I don't know," I say, quickly looking to the floor, avoiding eye contact at all possible costs.

"You're lying to me," she states, plainly.

"I'm not..."

"Yes, you are!" She says, irritated. "Arizona, who was it?" She never calls me Arizona. She means business. Either I tell her now or she's going to launch her own investigation.

"Cohen," I feel sick as his name leaves my mouth. "It was Cohen."

"Cohen... right..." She stands up and marches towards the door, obviously intent on hunting him down and seriously fucking him up, or getting someone else to. I don't want her to. I don't want her to throw her life away over some assault charges against that asshole. And, I don't want to be alone right now. I'm terrified he's going to find me here and finish the job.

"Teddy, please... don't," I cry out. She stands completely still at the door. "I need you here. Please, don't go!" I say, desperately. She pauses before turning to face me, rushing back to my bed. She takes my hand and wipes away a tear that I didn't realise had escaped.

"It's okay, Zo," she says, gently. "I'm not going anywhere."

...

_Teddy_  
Visiting hours are almost over, but the thought of leaving my best friend here by herself fills me with dread. She's trying to laugh and joke with me, but she's clearly terrified. Every time there's a lull in our conversation, she fills it with random rambling. She doesn't want to stop to think about the attack for even a few seconds.

"Teds," she says out of the blue. Her voice has changed. It's low and quiet. She's not smiling any more. All colour has been drained from her face. "I need you to get me a doctor... nurse... anyone..."

"What's wrong?" I ask, panicked.

"I'm bleeding," she says, vaguely. My brow furrows as I notice the wound is still clean and fresh.

"Zo, your stomach's fine, honey," I try to reassure her.

"It's... it's not my stomach..." she stutters. I frown in confusion. She shifts uncomfortably and I notice her squeeze her legs together. My eyes widen as I watch the thick, red liquid pool at the lower end of her bed. I look back at my friend's frightened expression before rushing into the corridor.

"Can you help?" I call over to one of the nurses by the reception. "M-My friend... she's bleeding," I say, unable to get anything else out.

Two nurses rush to help. They exchange a look when they notice the amount of blood, but remain professional as they speak to Arizona.

"Ms Robbins, we're going to have to take a quick look down there, okay?" One nurse says, calmly. "It won't take longer than a minute," she says. My friend's eyes fill with tears but she nods her head slightly, giving permission. As soon as the nurse begins to part her legs, they snap back shut.

"No. Stop... STOP!" She yells. What the hell is going on?

_Amelia_  
As I walk through the trauma ward, I'm stopped by the sound of some sort of commotion coming from Room 2428; Arizona Robbins's room. I rush in to find two of our nurses trying to calm the distressed woman. Teddy stands to the side of Arizona, looking completely bewildered. She doesn't know what to do. Arizona is screaming at the nurses, telling them to get away from her. It's not angry screaming; she's begging them to stay away from her. She's petrified.

"What's going on?" I ask Nurse Liz.

"She needs an exam," she explains, motioning to the bloody end of the bed. "We can't get near her." That's a lot of blood. We need to calm her and quickly.

"Arizona," I touch her arm and her head turns so quickly she could have snapped her neck. It's as though she didn't notice me enter the room. "Hi. My name's Amelia Shepherd. I live in your building," I state, gently.

"I-I know," she stutters. Beads of sweat start to run down her face as her entire body trembles.

"Take some deep breaths for me," I instruct. She tries to do as she's told, but she's too scared to calm her erratic breathing. I take a cloth from the nearest cupboard and wet it, before draping it over her forehead. The cold water seems to soothe her slightly. "Look at me," I say, quietly. Her eyes dart to me and I manage to hold her gaze. "You're safe here," I reassure her, taking one of her thin, shaky hands in mine. "We need to get you checked out, okay? It's going to be a little uncomfortable for a minute, and then it's going to be over." She swallows and closes her eyes tight, nodding her head as she tries to suppress the sobs that are desperate to escape her body. I turn my attention to Teddy who is wearing the exact same look she was wearing when I first walked into the room. "Hold her hand," I instruct, gently. She follows, taking Arizona's hand from mine. Arizona immediately clutches her friend's hand close to her chest, but doesn't take her frightened eyes off Nurse Ann.

_Teddy_  
I don't know what the hell has happened to make her this scared, and I don't know what to do to make it go away. I feel utterly helpless.

"Talk to her," I hear Dr Shepherd say. I don't really know what to say... Humour. I need to make her laugh.

"C'mon, Zo... You don't usually have this much trouble letting pretty women near your..."

"Nothing sexual," the doctor interrupts. What? I knot my eyebrows together as I look at her. Amelia avoids my gaze, keeping her attention on my friend. Then it hits me like a tonne of bricks. He didn't just stab her... and there's a reason that blood isn't stopping. How did I not realise this sooner? I'm a qualified M.D for God's sake!

A gasp escapes her throat and a tear rolls down her cheek as the nurse starts the examination.

"Zo, hey..." I grab her attention. "It's gonna be okay," I say as I start to stroke her hair, soothingly. The grip she has on my hand doesn't loosen. She continues to stare at me with terrified eyes, looking for answers that she knows I don't have. I need to distract her. "You know what I was thinking of on the way here?" I ask rhetorically, with a smile that I'm hoping eases her a little. "I was thinking about the meerkat dance... You remember we were arguing about when we started it? ...You thought it was on my birthday, and I thought it was the night that Tim wouldn't stop throwing up in that bush outside of The Unicorn?" She nods her head, but her expression doesn't change. "We were both wrong. It was in Percy's." With this statement, there's a look of realisation on her face. "Remember? The dares from Nick? The awkward table dancing?"

With this random anecdote, I feel like I'm almost getting her mind away from what's happening. There's a hint of a smile... but, then a short, sharp cry of pain echoes around the room. I glance in the direction of the nurse who looks awkwardly at Amelia. I don't pay too much attention to their exchange because I've got to focus on my best friend.

"It's gonna be okay," I whisper, rubbing a hand up and down her arm.

Moments later, the nurse stops probing and moves to talk to Amelia. Their voices are quiet and low. I watch them, waiting for some advice. My best friend leans back into the propped up pillows of the bed. She looks completely out of it.

"That's it; it's done," I say, quietly, continuing to run my hand through her hair in an attempt to comfort her. She gives me a brief, weak smile and I know it's the best she can muster.

"Arizona," Amelia's voice makes us both turn to her. She places a compassionate hand on my friend's shoulder. "There's some internal tearing that seems to have been missed."

"Which idiot missed that?" I ask, outraged. With my doctor head on, I know that this shouldn't have been hard to spot if they were checking her properly.

"Teddy," Arizona's voice is quiet. She grabs my hand and looks at me as if to say, 'Please don't make a big deal out of this'. I bite my tongue as I listen to the rest of the information.

"You're going to need some stitches," she says, sympathetically. "I'll page one of the trauma doctors and they can explain the process to you properly." That really won't be necessary. I know exactly what they need to do. Hell, Arizona knows exactly what they need to do. It's not going to be pleasant. "I'm going to be close by, so if you need me, just let one of the receptionists know," she says, squeezing Arizona's arm before exiting the room.

I look at my best friend; a broken shell of a woman. I want my thoughts to be wrong. I want her to tell me I'm wrong. I want her to tell me he didn't rape her.

"Arizona..." I whisper. She looks at me, vacantly. "Did he... Did he...?" I can't finish the sentence, but she knows what I'm going to ask. She grits her teeth and nods her head with closed eyes. "Oh, God," I breathe out, letting tears escape. Sobs start to rack through my body. How could anybody do this to her?

"Teddy, stop," she says so quietly that I almost don't hear her. "Teddy, you have to stop!" She repeats, shouting this time. "You have to stop because you're going to make me cry, and if I start crying... I won't be able to stop."

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry," I apologise, getting my own feelings under wraps and stopping my tears. I hold her hand, and look at her, attentively. "What do you need?"

She's quiet for a few moments, blankly staring at me, and then she lets out this heart-breaking cry. It's like nothing I've ever heard before. It's a sound that will be burned into my memory forever. Without hesitation, I climb into the bed with her and hold her tightly as she sobs. She buries her head into my shoulder and clings to me as though her life depends on it. Only pure evil could cause this kind of devastation. And, I'm not going to let him get away with it.

...

_Teddy_  
"Excuse me, Miss..." a gentle voice stirs me from my sleep. As I blink a few times, I realise I'm still holding on to Arizona protectively. "I'm so sorry," the voice comes again. I look over to the redhead it's coming from. "Visiting hours are over."

"Can't you make an exception?" I ask, agitated.

"I wish we could," she replies, genuinely. "I'm sorry," she says, again. I look down at my sleeping friend and my heart aches. I really don't want to leave her by herself.

"Will you get someone to call me? If she needs someone?" It's not really a request I'm making.

"Of course," the doctor reassures me with a soft smile. "My colleague Dr Hunt will be here if she needs anything. Dr Shepherd has insisted on checking on her, too."

Delicately, I start to remove myself from the small, sleeping woman. I lower her upper body onto the pillows and she begins to stir. Her eyes snap open and she immediately grabs my arm, looking at me with terrified eyes.

"W-Where are you going?" She asks, clinging to me.

"They're making me go home," I say, sitting in the chair next to her bed. "You're not going to be on your own, okay? There's a lot of doctors here looking out for you."

"Okay," she whispers with a nod.

"I'll be back as soon as I can," I promise with a kiss to her forehead.

I hear a quiet "Bye, Teds," as I head out of her room. I turn the corner and head towards the exit, a million things running through my head. One thought, however, screams at me more violently than the others; Cohen needs to pay for what he's done.


	3. Part 3

**Part Three**

_Amelia_  
The next time I check on Arizona, she's trying to get herself up and out of bed. Kepner tells me the suturing went smoothly, but she still shouldn't be pushing herself to move about independently.

"Do you need some help?" I intervene, walking towards her bedside.

"Um... could you just point me in the direction of the nearest bathroom?" She asks with an awkward smile.

"Sure," I reply. As she stands from the bed, she wobbles a little. Her hand moves to her stomach and she falls back into a sitting position with a grimace of pain. "Woah, careful. Slow movements," I instruct, this time taking both her hands in mine and helping her stand. "How's the pain now?" I ask, placing a hand on her back and leading her out of the room and towards the closest restrooms.

"Better," she says, unconvincingly. "Thanks... for looking out for me."

"Of course, we're neighbours," I say, nonchalantly. "We need to look out for each other," I finish, sharing a knowing smile with the other woman.

She looks me dead in the eye for a few moments, but says nothing. Those beautiful blue orbs become narrow, as though she's contemplating something. Her mouth opens and closes a couple of times but there's still no sound. Her eyes dart to the floor and back to mine, as though she's resetting her mind. Then, she shifts awkwardly, before she says: "Um... I'm gonna go pee."

"Hey," I grab her hand before she can enter. "It's... it's gonna be a little painful," I warn, gently.

"I know," she says, quietly, before going into the bathroom.

_Arizona_  
Okay, peeing was _way_ more painful than I thought it was going to be. As I wash my hands, I catch sight of myself in the mirror. I look awful. Dark circles surround my eyes and the bandages wrapped around my head make my hair stick out in all different directions. Little cuts are peppered over the left side of my face. That must have been from when I dropped to the floor. I look paler than usual and my lips are practically grey. I push down the nausea I'm feeling and exit the bathroom. Amelia's waiting for me with a warm smile. She gets me back to the hospital bed without any trouble.

"Do you... um..." I don't know if I should be asking this really. I don't want her to think I'm not going to take my recovery seriously. "Do you know when I can be discharged?"

"Probably not for the next few days," she says, sitting at the edge of the bed. "There's still a few tests and checks to be done."

"I-Is there any way it could be sooner?" I say, panic starting to set in. She looks at me, confused. "I, uh... I don't... I don't have health insurance... And, I'm kind of broke."

"You don't have to worry about money," she says, placing a gentle hand on my forearm. "Just focus on healing."

"No, I mean... I'm _broke_-broke. I have _no_ money. Not even enough to pay for health insurance," I quip. "Which is kind of ironic because I'm guessing this hospital trip is going to cost, like, what? Five or six grand?"

"Arizona, you're not hearing me," she replies, with an intense gaze. "You don't have to worry about that."

"Oh! I... I wasn't asking for free healthcare," I say, quickly, worried that she might think I don't appreciate the efforts of the hospital staff. "Resources cost money, doctors cost money, I get that. But, just... the less, the better, you know?"

"I'll see what we can do," she says with a smile. "Try and get some rest."

...

_Amelia_  
At 8:15am, my shift has finally finished and I'm back in my regular clothes. My last stop before I go home for the day is Arizona Robbins. As I enter the room, I see her on her side, staring blankly at the wall.

"Hey," I start, gently. She turns her head and snaps herself out of her daydreaming. I dread to think what kind of thoughts I've interrupted. Nonetheless, she returns a weak smile. "Have you slept at all?" I ask as I settle on the edge of her bed.

"No, I... I can't," she says with eyes so sad it makes my chest tight.

"Want some company?" I say without a moment of hesitation.

"You look like you're headed home..." she says with a courteous smile. I shrug back, nonchalantly.

"I've got some time until visiting hours," I say. "Is Teddy coming back today?"

"I think so," she says through a tired yawn. She can barely keep her eyes open.

"She was very reluctant to go yesterday," I observe. "I wouldn't be surprised if I found her outside counting down the minutes until she can come back in," I say with a faint chuckle. This prompts a genuine smile from Arizona and my chest feels lighter. "You two are close, huh?"

"She's my best friend," she explains. "We take care of each other," she says with another small smile. "She's a doctor, too."

"She is? Where does she work?" I ask, intrigued.

"Uh... She's... not in medicine right now," she says, awkwardly. I decide not to pursue it. "She's waiting on a medical position in the army," she sighs out. "Which... absolutely terrifies me." I didn't think it was possible for this woman to look more fragile, but in this moment, she's more vulnerable than I've seen her before. Without much thought, I take her slender hand in my own and allow my thumb to graze across her smooth skin.

"It's incredibly brave," I say, quietly. "You must be proud of her."

"Oh, I am. I really am," she says, quickly. "It's just... I lost my brother in Iraq. The thought of losing Teddy as well is... not something I can think about."

Jesus Christ. This woman has really been through the wringer. I squeeze her hand a little tighter and look at her with unadulterated honesty.

"I'm sorry," I say croakily, tears attempting to infiltrate my eyes. "I lost my brother, too. I get it..."

"What happened?" She asks, before her face changes, realising she may have crossed a boundary. "Sorry, I... I, uh-"

"No... it's okay," I say, strangely at ease with this woman. "It was a car accident," I say, vaguely.

"I'm really sorry," she says, genuinely. We share a look of absolute empathy. It's intense, but full of understanding for the other person's grief. I'm the first to break eye contact, looking to the floor and thinking about what else to focus on.

"Can I get you anything? Are you hungry? Thirsty?" I say, changing the subject. She shakes her head. This is something we'll have to monitor. She's been in the hospital for over 24 hours, and all she's consumed is small sips of water.

"No, I... I just feel nauseous," she replies. I squeeze her hand tighter, repressing the urge to spit out a load of medical advice. I'm not Arizona's doctor. I'm a support. I'm a distraction from this shitty experience.

"So, how long have we been neighbours, anyway?" I ask with a small smile.

"I've been in that building for a year now," she replies with her own sweet smile. "Since I graduated," she explains.

"Where did you go to college?" I ask, out of intrigue rather than courtesy.

"Harvard," she replies. My eyebrows shoot to my hairline. "Not what you were expecting?" She smirks, noticing my reaction.

"You must be _super_ intelligent," I comment.

"Do I not give off that vibe?" She quips.

"No, it's not that, it's just..." No matter how I word this, it'll come out as inappropriate. What I'm actually thinking is, 'This woman is as intelligent as she is sweet and beautiful'. I don't know how to say that without sounding like an utter creep. "Uh, never mind," I finish, heat rising in my cheeks as I squash my thoughts.

"Good morning!" I'm saved by another voice coming from behind me. I twist my head to see Teddy enter the room with an armful of books and candy bars. Suddenly, I'm very aware that I'm still holding onto Arizona's hand. With one last squeeze, I let go and push myself to stand.

"I'll see you later," I say with a reassuring smile before leaving her side. I glance at her roommate as I walk out. "Hey, Teddy," I say with a smile before exiting the room.

_Arizona_  
"Hi, Dr Shepherd," Teddy says, shooting me a smirk and a pointed look. She places the books and chocolate on the table to the side of us and takes the space previously occupied by Amelia. "That looked cosy..." she says, wiggling her eyebrows. I roll my eyes at my scandalised best friend.

"She was just being nice," I say, firmly.

"If you say so," she says with a mischievous grin, trying to wind me up further. "Move up," she says, shifting herself to sit next to me, like we're about to have a slumber party or something. She hands me one of the many books she's brought to occupy my mind whilst I'm stuck in here. "I brought your favourite!" She says proudly, handing me a pack of pretzel M&Ms and a Tootsie Roll.

"Thanks," I say with a smile. The mere thought of even trying to eat these right now churns my stomach.

"You not gonna eat them?" She asks, disappointedly.

"Teddy, it's 8:20 in the morning!" I laugh. "I'm not in a chocolate-y mood right now," I say, starting to read Stephen King's _Under the Dome_.

"I've seen you eat worse than that in the morning," she reminds me.

"Yeah, you really need to learn how to knock before walking into my bedroom... especially after I've brought a woman home..." I raise my eyebrows at her, jokingly.

"Ew! That's not what I meant!" She says with a laugh. "I was referring to the time you ate those Chinese food leftovers or that four-day-old chicken burrito." I nudge her with my elbow before turning back to the book. We're comfortably silent for a few seconds, but I can feel her eyes burning into me, eager to ask question after question. I know she's restraining herself. She just wants to be here for me, she doesn't want to pester me with her thoughts. A huge part of me is grateful that she doesn't. "How are you doing today?" She asks, quietly.

"I'm really tired. I can't sleep at all," I say, honestly. "I'm... I'm scared to," I admit.

"You're safe here, Zo," she says, grabbing my thigh. I flinch at the sudden contact and she realises her mistake. She moves her hand to place it on top of my own and looks at me with sympathy. I hate that look. It's the same look people gave me after Tim died.

"Stop looking at me like that," I demand.

"Like what?" She asks, her eyebrows knotting together.

"Like I'm going to break. I'm not going to break," I say, more to myself than Teddy.

"I know..." she replies, gently.

"I don't feel safe," I confess out of nowhere, tears immediately filling my eyes. "I feel okay when you're here, or when Amelia's talking to me. But, when I'm alone, even for a second... I'm scared he's going to find me," I whisper, the silent tears falling down my cheeks. "Am I being crazy?" I ask, desperately.

"You're not being crazy," she reassures me, cupping one of my cheeks with her hand and looking me dead in the eye. "But, you don't have to be scared. I'm taking care of it."

"What do you mean?" I ask, confused.

"I mean he's not going to be a problem for much longer..."

This doesn't sound good.

"Teddy, what did you do?"


	4. Part 4

**Part Four**

_Arizona_  
Day three of being in the hospital proves to be a struggle. I've finally had a visit from the police. As painful and as difficult as it was, I gave them as much information as possible. Hopefully that means they'll get to Cohen before whatever thug Teddy's hired gets to him. I don't want anything to be traced back to her. It could cost her everything she's worked so hard for.

My train of thought is interrupted by a bright and breezy Dr Kepner. She's clutching her clipboard close to her chest, but beaming at me.

"Miss Robbins," she suddenly turns serious, like she's remembered something troubling. "How did this morning go?" She asks politely, referring to the police visit.

"Fine," I say with a quick smile. There it is. The look of sympathy. It takes all the energy I have to not roll my eyes at her.

"So, I have good news..." The redhead says cheerily, rapidly changing the direction of our conversation. "You can go home today!" Suddenly, she's my favourite person.

"I can?" I ask, excitedly.

"Yes," she replies. "On the condition that you agree to a couple of home visits."

"Okay..." I say, uncertain of what a home visit actually entails. "Thank you," I say, genuinely. She smiles at me before her pager beeps violently and she looks at me apologetically.

"I'm so sorry," she says, quickly. "I can explain more before you leave," she says before hurrying out of the room.

...

I stand nervously at the reception desk in the fresh clothes Teddy brought me this morning. It feels good to be out of that hospital gown. My best friend stands next to me, trying to keep my mind off of how much debt I'm about to be in. The receptionist who has a phone glued to her ear hands me the documents with an apologetic smile. Here it is; brace yourself, Robbins. Amount owed: $4,075... Fuck. Not as bad as I thought it was going to be, but still way out of my reach.

"What's the damage?" Teddy asks as she sees my face drop. I sigh out and hand her the papers. She studies them with a furrowed brow and grimaces as she reads the figure. "Okay, not as bad as it could have been... One free overnight stay... minimal fees for scans and blood tests... no charge for the food... I guess that makes sense, seeing as you didn't eat anything..." As she studies the paper further, her expression turns to one of anger. What's got her so irate?

_Amelia_  
I'm on my way to the canteen when I feel my arm being tugged to the side. It's Teddy. And, she doesn't look happy.

"$1,000 for a rape kit? Are they fucking kidding?" She whispers, harshly.

I look towards the reception desk and realise Arizona's signing her discharge papers, completely unaware of the conversation her roommate has just pulled me into. April Kepner stands next to her, wittering on about home visits. I turn my attention back to Teddy and sigh out, dejectedly.

"I know. It's not fair," I agree, trying to calm the pissed off woman in front of me. "I got the costs down as much as possible, but there was no budging from that."

"I get that... and she'll appreciate it more than you know," she tells me. "But, don't you think there's something so fundamentally wrong about making a rape victim pay that much money just so they have the evidence that proves they're telling the truth."

"I understand your frustration, I do," I say, honestly. "I'm really sorry, but there's nothing I can do," I conclude, starting to walk towards her roommate. "Hey," I say with a smile as I approach the desk. She looks up from the pile of papers she's signing and returns the smile. Sliding the paperwork towards our receptionist, she steps towards me, and fidgets awkwardly.

"I-I... um... you-" Her stammering forces her eyes to the floor. I keep a gentle smile on my face and squeeze her arm in an attempt to comfort her. When she looks back up at me, her eyes are shining with tears that are threatening to spill over. "You saved my life," she says, quietly. I shrug off the admiring comment.

"I didn't do much really," I say as I feel a blush creep up the back of my neck. "Dr Kepner did all of your procedures."

"Yeah, but... you found me," she croaks out. "If it wasn't for you, I..." She can't finish her sentence. Instead, she walks into my arms and envelopes me in a grateful embrace. I hold her close, as though I'm trying to give her some of my strength. "Thank you," she whispers. The gratitude tugs at my heart strings and makes my breath catch in my throat.

"You don't have to thank me," I reply, sincerely. As we separate and share a smile, Teddy and Kepner approach us.

"You ready, Zo?" Her friend asks, gently. Arizona nods, before turning to April, waiting for advice.

"So, I'll see you next Friday at six," Kepner confirms.

"Thank you, Dr Kepner," she replies, politely. Kepner leaves to see to her next patient and Arizona gives me a parting smile as she says, "Bye, Amelia."

"Bye," I say, quietly. I can't help but feel like she should be here a few more days just so we can keep an eye on her. Only three days after an attack like that just doesn't seem long enough. "Remember to rest," I call after her as the two women head towards the exit. I can practically feel her eyeroll from here.

...

It's only been a few hours since Arizona left the hospital, but I haven't stopped thinking about her. I'm desperate to know how she's coping and what kind of pain she's in. The wounds on her head and stomach were deep, but the psychological scars are going to be far worse. I don't know if anyone even mentioned psychiatric support to her. I'm worried about her... More than I usually am about patients.

So, here I am, standing outside her door at 8pm, clutching a bag of take-away food for her and Teddy, hoping that she hasn't eaten yet. I timidly knock at the door and wait for a response. A few moments later, the door opens a couple of inches, chain still attached to keep out any potential threat. I'm met with terrified and uncertain eyes. When she realises it's me, I see her physically relax. She closes the door to unhook the chain and when it opens again she greets me with a confused look.

"Hey," I say, giving her my best smile and hoping she doesn't think I'm a total freak. "I know you're probably sick of seeing me, but I didn't think you guys would want to cook tonight, so..."

"Thanks, that's so thoughtful," she says with the sweetest smile. "Come in."

"Oh, I don't want to intrude..." I say, honestly.

"You're not intruding! Come in," she insists. I enter the apartment and take a quick look around. It's open plan, a row of plain white counters separating the kitchen from the living room. I love the quirky décor in here. It's apparent that its occupants don't plan on staying here forever, yet it still manages to retain a cosy feeling, despite its minimalist simplicity. "Here, let me take those from you," she says, taking the bag full of Chinese food containers from my hands. "Do you want Teddy's portion? She's not here."

"Um... Where's Teddy?" I ask, slightly concerned that Arizona's here by herself. She starts to pour out a glass of soda for each of us.

"Oh, she's at work," she says, casually. "I went in too, but they sent me home."

"Good! I thought we told you to take it easy?" I scold.

"I can't really afford to take it easy," she says, pointedly.

"You can't afford not to," I state, referring to her health rather than her wealth. She rolls her eyes at me and I just find it completely adorable. What is it about this woman that I find so endearing? "You've got quite the attitude on you, Robbins," I smirk, before starting to wander around the living room section of the house as Arizona hunts for some clean cutlery. I'm looking at the various framed pictures and art the women have lying around. I stop when I get to Arizona's degree and study it for a moment.

"You think Johns Hopkins School of Medicine will let me in with that?" She says, gesturing to the frame after handing me a soda. We make our way to the couch and take a Chinese container each.

"_I_ went to Hopkins," I say as I begin to twirl the noodles around my fork. "They'll _definitely_ let you in!"

"Oh, my God! You did?" She asks, excitedly. "What's it like?" She's leaning towards me, eager to hear any details I have to offer as she tucks into her Chinese.

"Intense," I say, not knowing whether my reply is in response to her question or her gaze. Suddenly, she leans forwards and gasps, clutching at her stomach. "Are you okay?" I ask, worry evident in my voice.

"It's... it's sore," she stammers, looking at me with vulnerable eyes. My eyes travel to her wound and I soon realise the blood is rapidly trickling through her bandage. I imagine a few of the stitches have come out.

"Okay, that's bleeding," I say, and jump into doctor mode. "Lie down," I instruct, and she stretches herself across the couch as I rush into the kitchen to find something to control the bleeding. "This isn't like your best dish towel or anything is it?" I ask as I come back into the living room. Not waiting for an answer, I lift her shirt and press the white cloth to her injury.

"No," she says with a short laugh. There's a few moments of silence as I monitor her. She breaks the silence to avoid any awkwardness. "I-I started a shift at work before they sent me home," she says between laboured breaths. "I must have torn it then."

"Where do you work?" I ask, casually. She mumbles something that I can't quite hear. "Where?"

"Sapphire Lounge," she says, slightly clearer.

"The strip joint?" I ask, knotting my eyebrows together in confusion. "Oh..." I reply. And, then it dawns on me what she does for work. "OH!"

"Yeah... it's not my finest accomplishment," she says with a sigh. She avoids eye contact with me, like she's ashamed or something.

A knot forms in my stomach. Wow... I really don't like seeing her like this. What is wrong with me? I've only known Arizona Robbins properly for three days. I should feel nothing more than a doctor's sympathy. This is deeper than that. Maybe it's because she's an aspiring Hopkins student. Maybe it's because we've always sort of been in each other's presence. Maybe it's because we've both lost a brother. But, there's something about her that's making us connect on a different level; a more personal level.

"Do you have a stripper name?" I ask, playfully, trying to take the seriousness out of the conversation.

"What? No!" She defends herself with a chuckle.

"You give clients your real name?" I ask, raising my eyebrows.

"No, I don't... I don't really tell them anything. I just... dance for them." The soft laughter stops. Her eyes turn dark as though she's remembered something unsettling. I check her wound. It's still gushing. I'm definitely going to have to patch this up.

"Hmm... You're definitely a 'Krystal'," I joke. "Krystal with a 'K'."

"Shut up! I am not that trashy!" She laughs, showing me the most gorgeous dimples I've ever laid eyes on. Note to self, make this woman smile more often.

"Okay, what about 'Kandy'? Also with a 'K'," she laughs again, but this time grimacing afterwards at the pain caused by the injury. "Okay, I really need to stop making you laugh."

"I don't believe this kind of talk is very professional, Dr Shepherd," she says, confidently. It's a little flirty, but I brush past it.

"Well, technically, I'm just_ a_ doctor, I'm not _your_ doctor... I don't have to be professional!" I fire back and she, adorably, scrunches her nose up. "But, seriously? You can't be going to work. You need to rest, okay?" She rolls her eyes at me.

"Huh... You _sound_ like my doctor," she says, narrowing her eyes at me. I smile back but my tone turns serious.

"Listen... we're going to have to get this patched up," I say, gently. "You've lost a lot of blood in the last 72 hours. I don't really want you to lose any more," I elaborate. At the mention of another hospital visit, she begins to look uneasy. I really shouldn't offer, but I can't help it... "I've got a suturing kit upstairs if you don't want to go back to the hospital."

"Okay," she agrees.


	5. Part 5

**Part Five**

_Arizona_  
Stepping into Amelia Shepherd's penthouse immediately takes my mind off the pain in my stomach. Being in the same building, it shares some of the features my own apartment has; bare-brick walls, a lot of natural lighting, and an open plan concept. But, Amelia's place is _so_ much classier than mine. For starters, it's huge. Two of the walls aren't actually walls at all, but are made up entirely of massive clear windows that reveal breath-taking views of the city. Everything is sleek and modern. It's like a catalogue home.

"Wow... Did you bring me up here to make me feel bad?" I joke as I take in my beautiful surroundings.

"No, I brought you up here to make you feel _good_," she replies. I raise my eyebrows at how suggestive it sounds and she immediately begins to backtrack. "_Better_... to make you feel better!" She stumbles. I smirk at her and she rolls her eyes at me. "Shut up and lie down," she says, gesturing to her plush grey couch.

I do as I'm told and lift my shirt to expose the affected area. She dips into another room for a few seconds and comes back with an advanced-looking first aid kit. She kneels next to me and starts to inspect it the bandage, carefully.

"Have you already taken this off?" She asks, looking at the frayed edges.

"I had to," I reply with a shrug. "For work."

"Yeah, this should _not_ have come off yet," she scolds. "I'm hoping it's not infected." I grit my teeth as she starts to unravel the dressing. The release of pressure is painful - like I'm being stabbed again. Noticing my pained expression, she quickly presses a fresh, clean dressing to the gash. "It looks like the bleeding is calming down..." she says, her focus remaining on my wound. "I'm going to have a good look at the stitches now, okay?" She asks, gently. Nervously, I nibble my bottom lip but nod my head in permission. She removes the dressing and studies the area, meticulously. "Okay... it looks nice and clean. No infection... You're lucky, Arizona!" She looks at me with the same disapproving look. I avoid her gaze and she focuses on the stitches. "Yeah... this could do with four or five more stitches..." She trails off and looks at me seriously. "You sure you don't want to go to the hospital for this?"

"I'm sure," I say, affirmatively.

"Okay... so, first, I'm going to use the ethanol wipes to make sure the area's really clean..." She's back into doctor mode, talking through the process step-by-step. "It's going to sting for a few moments. Then I'm going to stitch you up... And, that's going to hurt like a bitch." She says, bluntly. "You sure you want this without pain relief?"

"I... I really don't want to go back to the hospital," I say, looking at her with pleading eyes.

_Amelia_  
I sigh out. There's no way I'm getting her to Grey Sloan... But, leaving this untreated could have catastrophic repercussions. So, against my better judgement, I start to treat the wound. As the antiseptic wipe touches her skin, she winces but doesn't make a sound. I throw it to one side and grab hold of the needle and thread. I feel like I need to check in with her once more before the painful part begins.

"Ready?" I ask, gently.

"Yeah," she nods.

As I begin to patch her up, she breathes out through the pain. We don't talk. I watch her movements and her expressions to see if I should continue. She's brave. The stitches take no longer than a couple of minutes.

"All done," I say with a smile, reaching for more fresh dressing.

"Thank God for that," she breathes out with a small smile. I help her into a sitting position on the couch.

"You know, we wouldn't be here if you'd rested... Like we said," I remind her as I wrap the bandages around her middle.

"Alright, I get it... I shouldn't have gone in," she says, her eyes beginning to shimmer with tears. "It's not like I _enjoy_ going there. I just... I need the money," she says, evading my eye contact. She's embarrassed. I don't like it. A woman as intelligent and beautiful and sweet as her shouldn't be ashamed of anything. I pin the dressing together before taking one of her hands in mine. She finally looks at me.

"If you don't like it, you don't have to work there," I say, softly. "You've got a lot of other options, you know?" I sit next to her, still holding her shaking hand.

"None that bring in that amount of money," she says, quietly. "Plus, I owed the owner... _a lot_. He put me through Harvard," she explains. "It seemed like a good idea at the time... to borrow the money from him. But, then I had to work at his club every break we got and during the summers. I still owed him after I graduated." Something about these dates doesn't add up to me.

"So, you started working for him when you were..."

"Seventeen," she states. This confirmation makes my stomach flip.

"How did you even meet a guy like that at seventeen?" I ask, a shiver running down my spine.

"Let's just say I didn't have the best upbringing," she scoffs. I look at her, waiting for her to continue. She wants to talk about something... To get it off her chest. I don't know how I know that... I just know she needs someone to talk to. Her face turns stoic and her eyes glaze over. "We were taken into foster care... Tim and I... I was four and he was seven," she explains. "They'd try to separate us... Make it easier to rehome us. But, I'd scream for him..."

_Arizona_  
I relive that awful time in my head. The time they wouldn't let me see my brother because the social workers were trying to give me away to various other families. Of course, the screaming and crying and lashing out of the terrified little girl that I was deterred them immediately.

"We never found a home," I tell the attentive woman beside me. "When Tim was sixteen, he no longer had a place at the dumping ground... They kicked him out. So, I went with him," I continue. "He told me to stay... Wanted me to be safe... Know where my food and shelter was coming from. But, I refused. Choosing between that awful place and escaping with my brother was an easy choice," I explain. I smile at Amelia and she returns it with a look in her eyes that's urging me to tell her more. "About a year later, Teddy found us... We started to hang out a lot and she soon figured out we had nowhere to stay. She took us in... Just in time for me to start high school, actually. She was only eighteen herself but managed to secure a place with her inheritance money after her parents passed away," I say, solemnly. "She had to sell the place to pay for college and med school. She helped Tim and I find a new place, though. He worked hard, paid all the bills... It worked for a few years. Teddy would come back and stay with us. Help us out... We became really good friends," I check Amelia's face to see if she's getting bored yet. She just looks at me with intrigue, so I continue. "In my last year of high school, Tim..." I sigh out, remembering when he dropped this bombshell on me. "He had no qualifications. But, that didn't matter. He wanted to join the army. He'd always wanted to join the army. He was born to protect people." I feel tears spike my eyes and I blink them back. Amelia's hand moves from mine to my back. "I mean... he'd protected me all these years," I smile through my tears. "I couldn't stop him from protecting other people." I look down and clear my throat, composing myself. "When he left for training, I had to find a way of supporting myself... Teddy knew this guy, Jerry... He hired me and... that's how I ended up there..."

_Amelia_  
Wow... and I thought_ I_ had a troubled past. I can't even imagine half the things this woman has seen.

"Your brother was a very brave man," I tell her. She smiles at me in agreement. "And, despite everything, I can't believe you graduated from _Harvard_," I say, with a crooked smile. "I'd have completely lost my mind, let alone graduated from one of the top colleges in the country. You're pretty remarkable, Arizona Robbins."

"I, um... I haven't really told anyone about... about that before," she says, sheepishly. "Apart from Teddy... and Nick... He was my brother's best friend."

"What made you want to tell me?" I ask, quizzically.

"I dunno," she says with a shrug. We share a knowing smile and I quickly change the subject.

"So... Do you have a plan for when you get to Hopkins?"


	6. Part 6

**Part Six**

_Teddy_  
After three months, I'm finally starting to recognise my best friend. I try and get her out of the house at least once a day. At first, she'd cling to me, terrified of any unexpected noise or contact from strangers. Any male passer-by was perceived as a potential threat and we'd have to go back home to avoid public breakdowns. But, it's getting better. We can walk to the park and back without any panic attacks. I guess it helps that Cohen's been arrested and she knows he can't get to her.

She doesn't need me to sleep next to her any more. She doesn't wake in the night, petrified of what might happen in the dark. At least, not to my knowledge. I check in with her as much as possible, making sure she's had a decent night's sleep. I do it discretely because I want her to know that I trust her judgement on what she does and doesn't need. I also want her to know I'm here if she needs my help with anything. It's hard to find the balance between completely smothering her and leaving her to fend for herself. Every day, I hope I've found the right balance for her.

"Zo, I'm back," I call out as I enter the apartment. "I brought your favourite," I say putting the grocery bags on the side. "I'm gonna cook us up some pesto chicken and pasta." There's no sign of her. I know she's here. Unless Amelia's taken her out, but she usually gives me a heads up if she has. "Zo?" I shout, confused, walking into our living room area. She appears in the bathroom doorway, clutching something in her hands. "There you are," I smile at her, but she doesn't respond. She looks pale, paler than I've ever seen her. "Hey, you okay?" Still no answer. I take a step closer to her. "Zo?"

"Teddy, I'm pregnant," she says in daze. The world stops. Everything around us silent... I finally realise that what she's holding in her shaking hands is a pregnancy test.

"What? How?" I ask, grabbing the stick from her hand. She's right. That's definitely a positive result. "Are you sure?"

"That's like the sixth test I've taken... all positive," she says, dazed.

"They gave you emergency contraception at the hospital, right?"

"Yeah," she whispers.

"Then, how-?" I can't finish my sentence.

"I don't know," she says, staring blankly ahead. Her mind must be running at a hundred miles an hour. I throw the test to one side and give her all of my attention.

"What do you want to do?" I ask, grabbing her hand in an attempt to show her that I'll support her in whatever she chooses.

"I-I don't know," she says as tumultuous sobs begin to run through her entire body. I wrap her in my arms and let her cry as much as she needs to. I don't know what else to do.

...

We've been crumpled together in heap in the bathroom doorway for over an hour now. Her tears stop and start periodically. It's like she forgets, then remembers all over again. She's unable to speak, and the few words of wisdom I have for her seem to go unnoticed.

"Teddy..." she finally whispers.

"I'm here, Zo," I state, reassuringly.

"I-I can't," she can't seem to get the words out of her mouth. "I can't keep this baby," she says, as more silent tears roll down her cheeks.

"Okay... okay..." I look at her face and know what she wants. "I can make the call if you want," I say, supportively.

"Please," she looks at me with pleading eyes. I cup her cheek and look at her caringly, ensuring she knows there's nothing wrong with the decision she's making.

...

_Arizona_  
Teddy sits next to me in the waiting room of Planned Parenthood. She is, without a doubt, the greatest friend I could ever ask for. She's been nothing but supportive for nearly ten years of my life. As my leg starts to shake, she senses my apprehension and holds my hand tightly. My senses are heightened to everything in the room; the ticking of the clock, the garish colours on the walls, the overpowering scent of bleach left behind by the cleaner. I can feel the heat of my skin rise and my palms begin to sweat. What am I doing? I don't want to do this. My chest becomes tight and my breathing speeds up. I need to get out of here.

"Teddy... I wanna go," I whisper.

"What?" She asks, confused.

"I don't... I can't..." I'm starting to hyperventilate. If I'm not careful this could turn into a full-blown panic attack. "I wanna go!" I say louder than intended, catching the attention of the other women in the room.

"Shhh, it's okay, it's alright," she says, rubbing my back. "We can go. It's okay," she reassures me. "C'mon," she says, soothingly, leading me out of the building.

...

_Amelia_  
I've got the day off, so naturally, I'm stood outside Arizona's door, waiting to be invited inside so we can spend the day talking and laughing and goofing around. We've made quite a habit of hanging out with one another, recently. I like her. She's still feisty and confident despite all the shit she's been through. She's a lot of fun.

When she answers the door, she stands before me in yoga pants, an oversized sweater and a blanket wrapped around her shoulders.

"Hey... I was gonna ask if you wanted to go grab some brunch, but you don't really look dressed for the occasion." I joke with a smirk.

"I'm sick," she replies, opening the door further so I can come in.

"What kind of sick?" I ask, concerned.

"I've been throwing up," she says, throwing herself back down on the couch. I sit next to her and tuck some fly-away hairs behind her ear.

"Do you need me to get you anything?" I ask, concerned.

"No, I'm okay. Thank you," she says, with a genuine smile.

"So, if you can't leave the house... Maybe we could go over your Hopkins application." I say with vigour.

"There's no point... I'm not going to Hopkins," she replies, down-heartedly.

"Jeez, Arizona," I start to tell her off for not believing in herself yet again. "You've got to stop with all this self-doubt. You _are_ going! And, you're going to be amazing!" I say with an encouraging smile.

"It's not self-doubt," she argues.

"C'mon," I say, grabbing her hand. "You were born to do this!"

"Amelia, I'm pregnant," she says with tears in her eyes.

"You're... you're pregnant?" I breathe out, shaken to my core. Please don't tell me it's his. "H-How pregnant?"

"Twelve weeks," she whispers. Yeah... that adds up. It's Cohen's. Fuck.

"Okay... okay," I say, trying to calm my own emotions before helping Arizona. "And, you've thought about your options?"

"Yeah... I, um... I went to Planned Parenthood with Teddy earlier, but... I... I can't..." She trails off.

"There's no shame in an abortion, you know?" I say, honestly. "Don't let other people make you feel shitty about it. It's your body... it's your decision."

"I know... It's not that..." She says, quietly. "I just... I don't know," her hands unconsciously run over her still flat stomach. My hand covers one of hers and she looks at me like a rabbit caught in the headlights.

"Is there anything I can do?" I ask, already knowing the answer.

"I don't think so," she says, tears spilling over her cheeks.

"Come here," I whisper, pulling her into a hug. Leaning into my side, she clings to my shirt and silently cries into my shoulder. I keep one arm strongly wrapped around her and use my other hand to stroke her hair, soothingly.

After a few minutes, her breathing becomes heavy. I look down and see that she's fallen asleep. Even through her sickness and exhaustion, I can't help but think how perfect her face is. I kiss the beautiful woman's forehead, hoping this provides her some comfort in what I know will be a disturbed sleep. I reach for the blanket that rests on the couch arm and drape it over her the best I can in this position. A few moments later, Teddy comes through the door, anti-sickness tea, avocados and plain crackers in her arms. She looks at her sleeping friend nestled into my side and smiles at me.

"How she doing?" She asks in a whisper as she puts her purchases on the kitchen counters. I sigh out and look back to the blonde in my arms.

"She's strong," I reply, not giving too much away.

"She told you?" Teddy asks, sitting in the armchair next to the couch.

"Yeah," I say, quietly. "You been on Google?" I ask, smirking at the odd collection of things Teddy has bought to try and cure Arizona's morning sickness.

"I thought she could try a few different things... See what works," she shrugs, looking sadly at her best friend. "I don't really know how else to help."

"Me neither," I say, giving Teddy a look of empathy. "There's not much else we _can_ do until she decides how to deal with this."

...

_Teddy_  
It's been about an hour since I walked into my apartment to find Arizona snuggled up to Amelia. I've put the TV on in the background to wash over any awkward silences we might share whilst our common interest is asleep. We chit-chat, but not about anything serious. I'm still grateful she's here. It's the most peaceful I've seen Arizona in the past three months, her facial features relaxed and her body still and calm. Amelia constantly moves her hand up and down her back, soothing any anxiety that could be building up inside. When she does stir a little, Amelia holds her closer and takes her hand, running her thumb over the top. My best friend's eyes flutter open and she winces at the light before looking at the woman holding her. She smiles at her and settles back into her side as she begins to properly wake up.

She really trusts her. That's a big deal for Arizona. I think she trusts a total of like three people; me, Nick and Amelia. And, they like each other. Not just as friends. It's obvious to everyone apart from the two women involved. Even the way they're looking at each other now is thoughtful, intense. But, romance is not what either of them have been thinking about lately, which is kinda sad. In different circumstances, they'd make a really sweet couple.

Suddenly, she moves very quickly, running to the bathroom and throwing herself in front of the toilet. She heaves a couple of times and then we hear the sound of vomit hitting the toilet bowl.

"How many times is that today?" Amelia asks me.

"Eight," I say with a grimace. "She's been up since 4am."

"Do you have popsicles here?" She asks, randomly.

"Um... no?" I say, perplexed.

"Sugar-free ones should help her... They'll keep her hydrated," she explains. "I can go and get some now."

"No, it's okay... You stay here, keep her company." I say, quickly. "I'll be back soon," I grab my keys and head out of the flat in search of something my friend can keep in her stomach.

_Amelia_  
I sit on the couch as I wait for Arizona to finish brushing her teeth. She soon appears back in the living room and sits closely to me, leaning on me to support her tired body.

"How you feeling?" I ask, gently.

"Wiped," she replies, simply. "Where's Teddy?"

"She's gone to get popsicles," I say, and she looks at me quizzically. "Good to keep you hydrated," I state with a smile. "I'm going to see if I can get hold of some promethazine from the hospital, okay?"

"Are you going to get into trouble for that?" She asks, concern evident on her face.

"Not if I don't get caught," I joke.

"Amelia..." She looks with a tired but warning look. A look that says 'don't you dare get into trouble over this'.

"I'm kidding! It'll be fine," I reassure her.

"Thank you," she says, resting her head back on my shoulder. "Um... Could you stay a little while?" She asks, sheepishly.

"Yeah, of course," I say.

I try to make her as comfortable as she was before. She's back in my arms, but this time she's fully awake, mindlessly watching the crappy daytime TV Teddy and I had on in the background.

"Amelia," she says, quietly.

"Mmm?" I reply, relaxed.

"I'm... I'm scared," she admits in a whisper.

The words break my heart. She's so incredibly vulnerable right now. I swallow the lump in my throat and hold her closer to me. I wish I could take her pain away; carry some of the burden somehow. But, it's impossible to.

"You don't have to be scared, okay?" I try to reassure her. "I'm here. Teddy's here. Every step of the way. No matter what you decide."


	7. Part 7

**Part Seven**

_Arizona_  
I'm keeping the baby... but, I'm not _keeping_ the baby. I'm going to give birth to this child and then he or she will go to their real home.

This is not history repeating itself. There is no way this kid is going anywhere near a foster home. I know they're different now... Slightly... Maybe. But, the baby won't be going to one. I'm going to find a family who are desperate for this child. A family who will love him or her unconditionally and are ready and able to support and raise a kid in the way I can't. I mean, I can barely support myself, there's no way I'd bring a child into this situation.

My stomach is becoming rounder by the day. When I started showing, I stopped working. Teddy can comfortably pay the entire rent, but I don't feel good about letting her do it. I've tried looking for alternative part-time work, but no one wants to hire a pregnant woman.

I no longer owe Jerry a penny. Not a single cent. It feels like an enormous weight off my shoulders knowing that I never have to return to that place. Next step is to get Teddy out of there, too. I'm constantly looking for different jobs for her. The thought of her being there without me to look out for her fills me with anxiety every day.

I had my twenty week scan a six weeks ago and everything was fine. There was some concern that my body was too small, but the baby's development is exactly as it should be. It was weird seeing the child on the screen. It was sweet... but I didn't cry. I wasn't overcome with emotion. And, I think it's because I know, in my heart, that this baby isn't mine. He or she needs to be with different parents. It didn't stop Teddy from tearing up when we heard the heartbeat.

When we left, she asked me if I thought I was doing the right thing in giving the baby up. She offered to help, physically and emotionally and financially, if I wanted to change my mind... But, I don't want to change my mind. This child doesn't belong with me. I'm just helping it grow.

I stopped being sick around week fourteen of the pregnancy, but today, twelve weeks later, I have experienced extreme fatigue that's been really tough on my body. I can't get out of bed. The thought of even attempting to eat anything makes me incredibly nauseous. Any movement creates an indescribable pain in my head, and I seem to be sweating from every pore on my body. So, I have lay here, and I have cried and I have slept.

Teddy's worried. She's hovering. She's wondering what's going to help me. I don't even know myself. I've been this way for hours and nothing is helping. I'm half-asleep when I feel her place a cold, wet cloth over my forehead. It's a relief. I grab her hand to signify my gratitude, but also in hopes that she'll stay with me. She gets it. She helps me sit up and I lean back into the plumped up pillows on my bed. She guides a glass of ice-cold water to my lips and when I'm finished I look at her with the biggest thankful smile I can muster. But, seconds later, I vomit on myself. For fuck's sake. I can't even keep down water.

Without words, Teddy quickly ties my hair back before throwing the sheets to one side and helping me walk to the bathroom. She turns the cold water faucet and lets me sit against the cool tiles as the bath fills up. She helps me stand, strips me of my sick-stained pyjamas and lowers me into the bath. I feel no embarrassment. We've done this for each other dozens of times before. Granted, previous incidents were alcohol-induced...

"Is that any better?" She asks, finally breaking the silence with her soft question.

I nod, unable to verbalise my response through fear of hurling again. She rubs a gentle hand up and down one of my arms before handing me my toothbrush so I can get rid of this awful taste in my mouth.

"I'm going to call Amelia, okay? See if she can give us any advice on what to do," she says, quietly. I half-heartedly nod in response. I really don't want Amelia to see me like this... but, I also feel like I need her.

_Amelia_  
I'm sat on my couch, soaking up a much-needed lazy day when an unknown number pops up on my phone. I don't usually answer these, but something in my gut compels me to. I press the green button and bring the cell to my ear.

"Amelia Shepherd," I answer, quickly, frowning at myself.

"Amelia? It's Teddy," the voice says, quickly.

"Hey... Are you alright?" I ask, confused as to why she's calling. I mean, I like Teddy and everything but we're not exactly close. We only hang out when Arizona's there, too.

"I'm fine. It's-It's Arizona," she stutters out. My heart stops.

"What's going on? Is she okay?" I manage to blurt out.

"Um... I... I don't think so," she says, panic evident in her tone. "She's tired... has slept most of the day. She's aching... The sweat is pouring out of her..." she reels off symptoms as fast as she can. "She's vomited, sh-she can't eat, can't even keep water down. She seems a little light-headed, too... I don't know what to do," she says, desperately.

"Where is she now?" I ask as calmly as possible, trying to control my own racing heart.

"I put her in a bath of cold water," she says, frantically. "It's the only thing that's soothing her."

"Okay," I keep my voice even. "Get her out, get her dressed and put her back to bed. I'll be down as soon as I can," I say, reassuringly.

"Thank you... Thank you so much!" Teddy says, voice full of appreciation.

I hang up and start to search my brain for what it could be. Without hesitation, I grab the best anti-sickness meds I have in my bathroom cabinet and head out of my apartment and sprint down the stairs. I get to the door and knock, hastily. It takes a minute or two, but Teddy opens the door and welcomes me inside.

"She's in my room... Hers is covered in vomit," she explains, hurriedly. She walks speedily towards her door and opens it up to reveal Arizona on top of the covers, laying in fetal position. "Zo... Amelia's here, sweetie," she says, gently. "I'm gonna go clean up that mess," she whispers to me, before exiting.

As I enter the room, I notice Arizona's face is twisted in pain. She's taking deep breaths, trying to hide the pain she's in.

"Hey," I say, with a small smile, crouching down next to the bed and taking her hand. "How you doing?"

"I've been better..." she says, attempting to smile back.

I waste no time in checking her over. First, I take her temperature - not too high, that's good.

"Any pain in your stomach?" I ask, pressing the bump, carefully.

"No pain, just nausea," she replies.

As I carry on, I keep her distracted with general conversation. I tell her about the hospital. I tell her about the new café that's opened around the corner from here. I tell her about the latest antics of my nieces and my nephew. She kinda laughs. She tries to talk back but her lack of energy is apparent.

"Well... You're gonna be okay," I state, confidently, at the end of my checks. "It's just a virus. Illnesses like this can hit you really hard when you're pregnant. Rest, stay hydrated and you'll be alright," I say, squeezing her arm. She looks more relaxed, but still pale and tired. "Take these, they'll stop the sickness," I advise, handing her the tablets.

"Are they going to hurt the baby?" is her immediate response.

"No, not at all," I reassure her. She quickly swallows them and chases them with the glass of water next to her bed.

"Thank you," she whispers, settling back into her pillows.

"Of course," I say, tucking her hair behind her ears and stroking her cheek.

"Were you busy?" She asks with apologetic eyes.

"Actually I was in the middle of a very hectic lazy day," I reply with a smile.

"I'm sorry... Kind of a shit way to end your day," she apologises.

"I don't mind it," I say, honestly. We look at each other silently for a moment or two. I realise that my hand is still resting on her cheek when I feel her tears hit my thumb. I wipe them away, quickly. "Hey... it's okay," I say, quietly. "It won't be much longer until those meds kick in. You'll feel much better soon, I promise!"

She nods her head to show she understands but the silent tears continue to stream down her face. She must ache from head to toe. Without much thought, I walk around to the other side of the bed and spoon myself around her. She turns to me and buries her face into my neck. I hold her close, trying to soothe the symptoms she's experiencing. The tears soon stop and she relaxes into me.

About twenty minutes of total silence passes. I'm warm and comfortable and have a pretty girl in my arms. I'm content and begin to feel myself drift off to sleep.

...

"Amelia..." That gentle whisper wakes me from my slumber. My eyes are still closed, but I can tell it's daylight. We must have slept right through to the morning. I turn my head to show the owner of the voice I've heard it and my lips come into contact with her soft skin.

"Mmm?" I murmur against her forehead.

"I'm hungry," she says, desperately. I let a short laugh escape at the statement. Opening my eyes, I see Arizona staring up at me with a hopeful smile.

"I'm glad you're feeling a little better," I say, genuinely. "What do you want to eat?"

...

_Teddy_  
Arizona's pregnancy hormones have taken us to the new café around the corner from our building. She sits with a meatball sub, two bananas, a bag of chips and a piece of cake in front of her. It makes the salads Amelia and I are tucking into look pitiful. She's never been able to eat this much. Even now she's eating for two, it doesn't seem doable. She's still so scrawny everywhere apart from her perfectly rounded bump. But, I'm used to seeing this bizarre image now. Amelia is, too. Our friend is half-way through her chips when she breaks the small-talk between the three of us.

"So, I-um..." she stammers, as though looking for the right words. "I found a couple who I think could be parents to the baby... And, I need you to give me your honest opinion."

"You found people?" I ask, surprised. I know that's always been the plan, but part of me thought she might reconsider. I mean, it's got to be incredibly difficult to give up a baby.

"Yeah, these guys," she says, showing us a photo of a happy-looking couple on her phone from a website entitled _Parent and Adoption Services Seattle_. "They're married... Can't have children biologically. They're both teachers and live in the suburbs. He likes to play guitar and she's a pretty decent photographer..." There's a beat as she checks our expressions for some sort of reaction. "So, what do you think?"

"They sound great," I say with a small smile, before scrunching my nose up at the description of the typical idyllic family unit. "If not a little dull..."

"More like a little _stable_," she counters with a smile.

"When are you meeting them?" Amelia asks, gently.

"Today," she replies. "In Kerry Park."

They share this sweet smile that makes my heart ache. Something tells me they don't even realise they're exchanging these looks of endearment; the secret smiles and stolen glances. They're just so natural together. They would _so_ be a thing right now if the world wasn't so fucked up. Suddenly, I realise their heads have turned to look at me.

"What?" Arizona asks, confused by my daydreaming.

"Um, nothing..." I brush off. "Do you need one of us to come with you?" I ask my best friend, trying to focus on the matter at hand.

"No, it's okay, Teds... This is something I have to do by myself."

...

_Arizona_  
God, I wish I'd taken Teddy up on her offer to come with me. I feel so incredibly nervous. Like I could royally screw up this tiny human's life if I say or do the wrong thing. Sitting here stewing over everything that could go wrong is definitely not doing me any good.

I'm nervously fidgeting with my hands when see the couple from the picture on the internet walk towards the bench I'm sitting on. They're both considerably taller than me. The woman has long, blonde hair and blue eyes similar to my own and the man has a rugged handsomeness about him. I stand to greet them.

"Hi! Arizona, right?" The woman says with a wavering but genuine smile. "I'm Ellie. This is my husband Matt."

"Nice to meet you both," I say with a smile, shaking their hands.

"So, um... did you get here okay?" Matt asks, small-talk falling out of his mouth awkwardly. Looks like they're both just as tense as I am.

"Uh... yeah, I live around here, you know?" I say with a soft smile, trying to lighten the awkwardness.

"Right... Sorry, we're a little nervous," Ellie apologises with a timid giggle.

"Please, don't be nervous," I say, feeling a little more relaxed around these people. "Just... be yourselves? Please?" I implore.

They agree with a nod of the head and a smile each, and we start to walk lesiurely around the park as we get to know each other.

...

_Teddy_  
Arizona has been gone for a few hours. I hope she's okay. I really feel like either Amelia or I should have gone with her to meet these people. But, she insisted on going by herself. She wanted to make her own impartial decision about the couple.

It's the only thing I've been thinking about since she left. I wonder if she'll tell them about the child's biological father... I wonder how she'll cope with it if she does...

Finally, I hear the key turn in the door and let out a sigh of relief. She enters the apartment with a huge grin on her face. Looks like it went well.

"Hey," I say, handing her a cup of herbal anti-sickness tea.

"Hey," she accepts the cup gratefully. "Thanks," she says, sipping the hot liquid and moving to the couch.

"So... What were they like?" I ask, taking a seat next to her on the couch, honestly intrigued.

She ponders for a moment, then, as she turns to me, a contented smile creeps across her face.

"Parents."


	8. Part 8

**Part Eight**

_Arizona_  
It's kind of unusual to have an ultrasound scan when you're thirty two weeks pregnant, but, under the circumstances, Dr Ryan agreed to see us. Ellie and Matt are desperate to see the baby and I want to do everything I can to make this process as natural as possible for them. I want them to feel like they're in control of this situation. The baby is theirs, after all.

In the past six weeks, we've hung out a lot. I don't know if that's normal, but it's just what feels right to us. I've even been to their house to see what the nursery is like... It's sweet; jungle themed and colourful. Ellie is a Kindergarten teacher who swears by early childhood development opportunities. She has picture books lining the shelves ready to read to the baby from day one. Matt's excited to get the child into music. In the corner of the nursery stands his guitar and a pile of sheet music for gentle lullabies.

The more I find out about the couple, the more I feel as though I've made the correct decision in choosing them to raise this child. They seem like kind and genuine people. They want to give the child a life full of experiences and raise him or her to have a mind full of curiosity. Most importantly, they want the child to feel safe and loved. I guess I can't ask for much more than that. Anything else is a bonus.

"There's your baby," Dr Ryan says to the couple next to me, bringing me from my thoughts. I look at the fetus on the monitor. It's much clearer now than it was at twenty weeks. My God, that's a big head! I turn to Ellie to make a joke about elective C-section for the sake of my vagina, but I'm stopped by the look on her face. She's completely mesmerised by the image in front of her. Tears have already started to roll down her cheeks. Matt grins at her happy tears and rubs a hand up and down her back. As he looks back to the screen, his own eyes start to shine but he manages to stay reserved. Ellie places one of her shaky hands in mine and looks down at me with a smile full of gratitude and admiration. "Everything looks great. Do you want to know the sex?" The OB/GYN asks.

"Yes!" Ellie says, excitedly, before looking apologetically at me. "Um... is-is that okay?"

"Of course, it's your baby," I say with a smile, trying to reassure her that she's the woman who makes these kinds of decisions now.

"Please," Ellie looks at Dr Ryan with pleading eyes. The doctor moves the transducer probe to another part of my globe-shaped stomach and pauses for a few seconds as we all wait for an answer.

"It's a boy," he says with a smile aimed at the expectant parents.

"A boy!" Matt exclaims as his grin grows even larger. Ellie can't control herself any longer - she bursts into tears of joy and launches herself into her husband's arms. He holds her securely and closes his eyes tightly as he leaves a soft kiss on her forehead. Dr Ryan begins to clear my stomach of the leftover ultrasound jelly and I pull my baggy sweater back over myself.

"I'll give you a few minutes," Dr Ryan says, courteously. He leaves the recording on the monitor and exits the room.

"Congratulations," I say, sitting up and smiling and the happy couple. Ellie turns out of Matt's arms and envelopes me in a delicate hug.

"He's perfect," she whispers, tears still flowing freely. "Thank you, thank you so much."

...

_Ellie_  
Arizona has been painfully quiet since the appointment... And, that scares me. I'm scared she's going to change her mind. She has every right to, of course. But, I don't think I can take that kind of heartache.

This just feels so right... Like the baby she's carrying belongs in our family. Like he's meant to come home with us. Be loved, and cared for, and raised by _us_. To have that opportunity taken away could destroy me.

Matt's gone to work, giving Arizona and I some time to ourselves. We're at her favourite spot in the park and I'm trying to make small-talk. She politely responds with a smile or a reply made up of a few words, but I can tell her mind's somewhere else entirely. She doesn't fill the lulls of silence with sweet rambling like she usually does. She just lets the breeze blow through her hair, and takes in her surroundings silently. I watch her and can practically hear the cogs turning in her head.

I can't bear it any longer.

"Arizona?" I grab her attention.

"Mmm?" she replies, her mind still obviously pre-occupied.

"Are you... um... are you having second thoughts?" I ask, trying to hide the nervousness in my voice. "About... about the baby..."

"Huh?" She asks, finally focussing on me, eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

"Well, I... I guess..." I take a deep breath and try to control my stammering. "I guess I'm asking if you're getting cold feet... about the adoption."

"What?" She replies, her face dropping. "No... God, no! You and Matt... You're made to be parents. You're made to be _this_ baby's parents."

"It's just... You seem... tense," I say, gently. "And, if you're having second thoughts... I mean, we would obviously be... devastated..." My voice turns croaky as I practically give permission for her to take my baby away. Every bone in my body is screaming at me, telling me to stop. "But... it's not too late to change your mind... if you're unsure... we could wait..." I say, quietly. I feel tears sting my eyes as I go against every natural feeling in my gut. "I don't want you to feel like I'm taking your child away from you," I whisper, my voice wavering.

"Woah! No... no... Ellie, you've got it all wrong..." She says, desperately. "This baby... He's _yours_. He's one hundred and ten percent _yours_! He belongs with _you_," she reassures me. "It's just... I..." She takes a deep sigh and tries to compose herself. "I just realised... I haven't told you about the biological dad," she says, turning scarily pale. "But, if I tell you... you've got to promise... Please, don't change your mind about this baby," she begs. Huh? What has happened to this woman to make her think that we'd even consider changing our mind about the baby? "Promise me," she pleads, her eyes filling up. I look at the devastation on her face and take one of her skinny little hands in mine.

"Nothing could make us change our mind," I tell her, honestly. "I promise."

...

**Three weeks later...**

_Amelia_  
"My body feels so _weird_!" Arizona exclaims as we walk around the block, ice creams in hand. "Like, I knew I was going to get bigger. Obviously..." she says, through a mouthful of ice cream. "But, it's everything that comes along with it..."

"Right... the swollen feet, the aching joints, the constant state of nausea..."

"My _boobs_!" She says, frustrated. "They're so big they're giving me back ache! And, they're rock solid, like, all the time!" My eyes immediately dart to the area she's describing and I receive a slap on the arm for my indiscretion. "Stop staring at them!"

"You brought them up," I say with a nonchalant shrug. We throw the empty ice cream tubs into the nearest trash can. Arizona stops walking and puts her hands on her back, letting out a groan. "You alright?"

"He's kicking the hell out of me," she says, agitated. "Get a load of this," she says, taking my hand and placing it on her stomach.

"Woah, he's active," I say with a small smile. He must have heard me because I'm given several more violent kicks.

"Now he's just showing off," she says with a short laugh.

She looks up at me, her eyes paler than usual due to the tiredness. We share this intense, silent gaze for a few moments; one that makes my heart jumps into my mouth. She opens her mouth to say something but instead her face contorts in pain and she grabs my forearms in an attempt to steady herself. I give her the support she needs as she leans into me. She takes some short, sharp breaths and I look at her with concern, trying to figure out what's going on.

"Are you okay?" I ask, quickly.

When I get no reply, I follow her eyeline. She's staring at the pool of liquid that's just landed around her feet. Every part of me freezes as I realise Arizona's just gone into labour.

"Shit..." she breathes out. She looks back at me with terrified eyes. "That's not good, is it?"


	9. Part 9

**Part Nine**

_Amelia_  
"I'm only thirty five weeks..." Arizona says from the passenger seat of my car. "It's too soon!"

"Hey, he's gonna be fine," I say, grabbing her hand. "Five weeks is nothing," I say in an attempt to calm the pregnant woman down, but I can tell she's still scared of what could happen. Her breathing speeds up as she experiences another contraction. God, this kid is coming fast. It's only been about one minute since her last one.

"Jesus Christ, I feel like I'm going to have this kid in your car!" She exclaims. Fortunately, the hospital's only two minutes away, otherwise I'd be in total agreement with her.

"We're really close to the hospital now," I reassure her. "Exhale for as long as you can, it'll help with the pain," I instruct, quickly. She closes her eyes and follows the advice.

"Amelia, I... I want to push," she says as we pull on to the parking lot. Beads of sweat have started to roll down her face.

"Okay... okay..." I speedily turn the engine off and unbuckle my belt. "Wait here!" I say, getting out of the car as quickly as I can.

"Where do you think I'm going to go?!" She yells, sarcastically, as I close the door. I run towards the hospital and commandeer the nearest wheelchair. I rush back to the car and help Arizona into it. Then, I rapidly move us into the hospital and grab Meredith.

"Page Dr Ryan, right now!" I demand. "I'm taking her up to O&G," I explain as I wheel Arizona towards the elevator.

"Hi, I'm gonna go ahead and assume you're Arizona," Meredith says as we start our ascent.

"Uh huh," Arizona replies, agitatedly.

"Do you want me to contact the adoptive parents?" My sister-in-law asks, gently. Arizona nods her head quickly. "And, your birthing partner?"

"Teddy Altman... Please!" She says as the elevator doors open at our destination. Dr Ryan is already there waiting for us.

"Miss Robbins, come right this way and we'll examine you," he says, with a relaxed smile.

"No time... he's nearly here," she says, frantically.

As we get her into a hospital gown and onto the bed, I can't help but think how strong she's being. I haven't heard her scream once, but I know how much pain she's in. She seems to be putting all of her energy into making sure this little boy arrives safely.

Dr Ryan goes to start his examination, but his eyebrows immediately shoot to his hairline.

"Wow, you're right," he says, surprised. "This baby is coming now!"

Suddenly, Arizona grabs my arm and holds on tightly. She looks incredibly vulnerable. Like she might break if I leave.

"Can-can you stay until Teddy gets here?" She asks with pleading eyes. "P-please?"

"Of course," I say, immediately. I pull up a seat next to her and hold her hand. She squeezes my fingers together as she starts her first push.

...

_Teddy_  
Arizona is in labour. Actual labour. It's taken about twenty minutes for me to get here, I hope I'm not too late! I rush into her room and pale at the sight before me. She's completely drenched in sweat, and her face is twisted in pain as she attempts to push an actual human through her vagina. I shake my head and move closer to the bed.

"Oh, my God, Zo! How are you doing this?" I ask, amazed by her strength.

"Not what I want to hear right now, Teddy!" She shouts at me.

"Right..." I say, realising my insensitivity. "Hey," I smile briefly at Amelia. "Thanks for looking after her."

"No problem," she replies, standing so I can take her place. "I'm gonna be right outside, okay?" She says. Arizona nods quickly before she starts pushing again. She crushes the bones in the hand she's holding onto. Ow, ow... OW! That's definitely going to leave a bruise!

"Baby's crowning," Arizona's OB/GYN says, calmly. Looks like I got here just in time! My friend collapses back into the pillows, and looks at me, helplessly.

"He's nearly here," I tell her with a smile.

"I'm really tired," is all she can reply with.

"I know, honey. I know," I say, sympathetically stroking her hair. "Not long now... Just one more big, big push, okay?"

"Okay..." she whispers, closing her eyes to prepare herself for the final part of the delivery. She starts her last push as the doctor counts down from ten. When he reaches zero, the baby is out and a loud cry fills the room.

I can't help but stare at him. He's really little but really strong, flailing his arms and legs about already, and showing off his lungs with those classic newborn cries. I feel a huge grin spread across my face aimed at the little character.

I turn to my best friend who is tiredly watching the doctor's every move. He does a few initial checks on the infant then puts him on the scale to measure his weight.

"Good news, Miss Robbins," the doctor starts. "It looks as though the baby will be able to go home with his parents today," he says with a smile. A sigh of relief runs through Arizona's body. "He's very healthy, a bit small of course, but healthy: five pound four ounces, a regular heartbeat, and his lungs sound great," he says, swaddling the baby in fresh blankets. "Would you like to hold him?"

"No," she says, quickly. "Can I just... Can I see him?"

"Of course," the doctor says, holding out the baby for me to take. I look at the tiny boy and then the doctor. He motions again for me to take him to show Arizona. Shakily, I take the newborn from him and study the little guy. He's like a miniature, male Arizona. He has a small amount of very fair hair on top of his head, and the same button nose. I'm fairly convinced I've just seen some dimples in those cheeks as well. I lower him in a way that Arizona can get a good look at him. There's a few uneasy moments of silence before a smile makes it's way onto her own face.

"He looks like me," she says through a short, relieved laugh. "He doesn't look like Cohen. He looks like me," she says, fighting back tears, as she looks at me briefly. My chest tightens and I feel myself become emotional. When her eyes dart away awkwardly from the child, I hand him back to the doctor.

"How are you feeling?" I ask my friend.

"Sore, but fine," she smiles, weakly.

"And, how are you feeling... How are you feeling about the baby?" I ask, uneasily. She's been adamant that Ellie and Matt have always been the parents of this child. Of course, everything could change now he's actually arrived.

"He's still theirs," she confirm with a nod of the head.

…

_Arizona_  
Teddy left about an hour ago to run some errands. She wants to make sure I go home to a clean and well-stocked apartment. Amelia's working a shift, but she's found the time to pop in and out to see how I'm doing. I've mostly been alone, just sleeping and thinking. My emotions are running wild right now, even more so than when I was pregnant. I cry, then laugh at myself, then cry some more. I'm not really sure why I'm laughing... I'm not really sure why I'm crying.

"Arizona," I hear Ellie's voice. She enters the room quickly and sits in the chair next to me. "Are you alright?" She asks, worriedly.

"I'm fine, really," I smile at her. "The doctor's said this would happen," I say indicating to my tears. I push out a breath and try to compose myself. "Have you met him?"

"We have! And, we are so, _so_ in love with him," Ellie beams at me. "God, Arizona, he's... he's just perfect!" She takes my hand and gives me the most appreciative look I've ever received. "His name is Charlie," she reveals.

"He looks like a Charlie," I say with a smile. Suddenly, she wraps me up in a tight hug.

"Arizona... We could never tell you how much this means to us," she whispers. "Thank you."

...

_Ellie_  
Matt has our new baby wrapped up in his arms. I've never seen him so enamoured by anything or anyone before. I flit between signing discharge papers and beaming proudly at my husband and son.

When it's Matt's turn to sign, I take the baby from him. He's so tiny, I'm terrified I'm going to break him. I handle him with ultimate care. As he becomes a little fussy from the transition from his father to me, I start to bounce him, carefully. He soon stops and snuggles back into my arms. From the corner of my eye, I spot a short, pale, brunette doctor watching me. Maybe I haven't quite mastered this...

"How does this look?" I ask, with a nervous smile. "Am I doing it right?" Her eyes widen with shock for a moment, as though I've caught her doing something she shouldn't. But, then her face wears a comforting smile.

"You're doing great," she says, encouragingly. "Congratulations," she says, quietly, before rushing off.

Huh... that was weird...

...

_Amelia_  
The boy looks exactly like Arizona. Hopefully, he grows up to have her wonderful personality, too. I enter her room and see her sitting up, reading through a worn-out copy of _The Great Gatsby_.

"You're incredible, you know that?" I tell her from the doorway. She looks up from her book and shoots me a confused glance. "You completed someone else's family today... Not many people can say that," I say, impressed by her selflessness. She puts the book to one side and brings her hands up to hide her face.

"That's such a nice thing to say," she says through her tumultuous tears. Oh, God. Her hormones are all over the place. Poor Arizona.

"Oh, hey!" I rush to her bedside. "That wasn't supposed to make you cry..." I say, cursing myself for my stupidity. "I'm sorry!"

"Don't be sorry... I needed to hear that," she says, genuinely. "I'm just a little... a little... e-emotional," she sobs out. I take the space next to her, sitting on the bed and wrapping her up in my arms.

"Come here," I say with a short laugh. "You're kinda being a drama queen, Robbins," I say, light-heartedly. This produces the most wonderful laugh from her.

"Shut up!" She says, playfully. As she rests against my shoulder, I press a soft kiss to her forehead.

Arizona tilts her head to look up at me. Our faces are close. Those beautiful blue orbs dart from my eyes to my lips and back again. No... She's not going to, right? She leans in and plants a firm but gentle kiss on my lips. It's brief but amazing. Against my better judgement, I'm able to react by the time of the second kiss. The third comes softly, before she settles back down to my shoulder. I'm completely frozen.

Um... what just happened?


	10. Part 10

**Part Ten**

_Amelia_  
Arizona and I have just finished off two platefuls of syrup-covered pancakes and are in casual, comfortable conversation. We're lazing around on the couch when I feel her nudge me with her foot.

"Yes?" I smirk at her as she coyly tries to get my attention.

"Um... I've been meaning to talk to you about... Well... " she starts, awkwardly, sitting up and turning her body towards me. I give her an uncertain glance, signalling I'm not too sure what she's talking about. "You know... after the baby had gone home... and you came to see me..." Oh, the kiss... she's definitely talking about the kiss. "Uh... I... I'm sorry," she says, with a sheepish smile. I sit up and mirror her position. "My hormones were crazy... and you were being so nice... and I... I just... I don't know, I..." Oh, the rambling. The rambling is so cute.

"It's fine... I know I'm very attractive," I joke, putting a playful spin on the conversation.

"Shut up!" She says with a laugh and a hint of embarrassment.

"Completely irresistible in my scrubs," I continue, sarcastically. "Tell me, what was more enticing? My hair after it'd been under a scrub cap for two hours or the smell of TCP?"

"You're so annoying," Arizona laughs again, throwing herself back into the couch and covering her face with one of the cushions. I take one of her hands and make her lower it, ensuring she's looking at me. I think it's time I put her out of her misery.

"You don't have to feel uncomfortable about it," I say with a gentle smile. "I know how bad your hormones were that day. Don't worry," I reassure her, calmly.

"Thank you," she whispers, looking at me gratefully.

"You want to kiss me again, don't you?" I tease, not being able to resist getting one last jab in. She throws the cushion she was holding in my direction, narrowly missing my head. "Okay, I'm kidding, I'm kidding... Jeez!" She rolls her eyes at me in response.

"You're a pest, Shepherd," she says with a dimpled smile. Ugh, she's so cute.

"Hey, are you and Teddy busy June 15th?" I ask, rapidly changing the subject.

"I don't think so," she replies. "Why? That's like over a month away..."

"Well... it's my birthday," I say, awkwardly. "And, I'm having a little rooftop get together barbecue type thing..."

"A party?" Arizona summarises for me with a smirk.

"Sort of," I say, nonchalantly. "And, I wondered if you guys wanted to come."

"Sure, sounds good," she responds, sweetly. Suddenly, her eyes widen in realisation. "Oh, my God... You're going to be _30_!"

"Okay, let's not try and make a big deal out of this..." I say, scooping up our empty dishes and making my way into the kitchen side of the apartment, putting them in the sink full of soapy water. She follows me... probably to tease me about it!

"Wow, that's super old," she mischievously antagonises me as she grabs a dish towel ready to dry whatever I'm washing. "I was going to get you something cool and hip for your birthday, but maybe a walking frame is more appropriate..."

"That's enough out of you, Robbins!" I say, flicking bubbles her way. She winds up the dish cloth and whips me on the ass with it as though we're in a locker room. A gasp escapes my throat at the contact. "Oh, it is on!" I say, challengingly. She shimmies back into the living room area, using the counters as a divide between us. "Get over here," I say, mock-threateningly with handfuls of soapy water. I dart to the other side of the counters, and grab her waist with one hand. She squeals with laughter, as my other hand hovers over her face, stopped only by Arizona's hands on my wrist.

"Hey, I gave birth two weeks ago! You have to be gentle with me," she bargains.

"Excuses, excuses," I reply, finally getting the suds on her face. We are both in fits of laughter when Teddy comes through the door.

"Hey, guys," she says with a wide smile.

"I'm being bullied," Arizona tells Teddy, giving me a quick jab in the stomach.

"She's being a _pansy_," I correct her, nudging her with my elbow. Teddy grins at us both.

"What you guys doing today?" She asks, setting down the groceries she's just been out to get.

"I was just popping by," I explain. "I've got work in... Oh! A half hour!" I say, before I begin rushing around to gather my things and leave. I kiss Arizona on the cheek before I go. "See you later," I say, quickly. "Bye, Teddy," I wave before I exit the apartment.

_Teddy_  
Arizona still has this big goofy smile on her face when she throws herself back onto our couch and begins to watch whatever's been on the TV. I smirk as I go to sit next to her. I hand her a soda and open my own as I put my feet up on the coffee table.

"So... when are you going to ask her out?" I ask, playfully.

"What?" She retorts, scrunching her eyebrows together as though I've asked her what the capital of Switzerland is.

"Oh, come on... You two are_ so_ into each other!" I say, directly.

"Teddy, I'm _really_ not thinking about dating right now," she says with an eye roll.

"You practically _are_ dating, you know?" I point out. "Can you remember the last time you didn't see each other at some point in the day?"

"It's not like that," she insists. "We're friends."

"If you say so..."

I leave the conversation there. I know not to push it. On some level, I agree with her. She's not ready to date. She's been through so much in the past nine months. Even by Arizona standards. But, they're so good for each other, it just seems like such a waste...

"She invited us to her birthday party," she says, interrupting my thoughts. "You wanna go?"

"Sure, when is it?" I ask.

"June 15th," she confirms.

"Um... yeah, sounds good..."

Little does my best friend know that I'm expecting a call from the army any day now, confirming my departure date.

...

_Arizona_  
A few hours later, I hear a fast knock on our door. We rarely get visitors without warning unless it's Amelia, but she's in work.

"I'll get it," I call to Teddy, who's only just sat down to relax. I open the door to reveal an unexpected face.

"Hey, Flagstaff!" Nick says with a wide smile.

"Nick!" I exclaim, launching myself into his embrace. "What are you doing here?" I ask, bringing him inside the apartment.

"I, uh- I can't work for the army any more," he admits. "I haven't been right since... well, you know, since I watched Tim..." he trails off and grits his teeth, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "I've been honourably discharged," he explains. "Get over here, Altman," he says, with an impish smile, prompting Teddy to move from the couch. She rushes over to him and envelopes him in a tight hug.

"How are you feeling about that?" I ask as they break the embrace.

"Yeah... Good, actually," he says in an upbeat manner. "I didn't think I would, but..." he shrugs his shoulders, nonchalantly. "I'm working in the city... And, you guys were obviously going to be my first port of call," he says, nudging me. "So, what have I missed?"

Oh, God... I haven't told him.

...

_Teddy_  
"Tell me his name," Nick says in a low, gruff voice.

"Nick..." Arizona tries to stop his anger building, tears still in her eyes from explaining the terrible things that have happened to her.

"Tell me his fucking name!" He says, loudly, making both Arizona and I flinch. "I will rip him limb from limb."

"He's in prison," she says, tiredly. "He's going to be in prison for a long, long time."

"And, the baby... I could have helped you..." he says, exasperated. "You didn't have to give him up..."

"Nick!" I shout, shocked by his sharp and insensitive reply.

"What?" He throws his hands up, confused by my response.

"He wasn't mine, Nick!" Arizona cries. "He_ never_ felt like mine," she confesses. "I don't know if that makes me selfless or if it makes me entirely fucked up," she says, honestly. "But, he didn't belong with me either way. And, I didn't want to keep him from his real family."

At this revelation, Nick's face drops. He wraps our old friend up in his arms holding her head securely with one hand.

"Okay, okay..." he soothes. "I'm sorry," he says, earnestly. He sighs out, sadly. "Did he... Are his family good people?" He asks, shakily.

"The best," she whispers.

"Guys, let's get out of this apartment," I say in an attempt to break the tension. "We'll go grab some drinks and just relax." Arizona looks from me to Nick and back again.

"I think that's a good idea," she nods her head in approval. "Just... let me fix myself up," she says, walking towards her bedroom.

"We should totally go to Joe's," Nick says, with a reminiscent smile. We used to go there altogether when we all lived in the city; me, Arizona, Nick and Tim.

"Yeah, we should," my friend smiles back before disappearing. Nick watches her move into the bedroom and turns to me when he's sure she's out of earshot.

"How's she been?" He asks, quietly. His expression is one of devastation and heartbreak.

"Incredibly brave," I sigh out, giving him a half-hearted smile.

"I wouldn't expect anything less," he responds, solemnly.

...

_Amelia_  
"Let's go to Joe's," Meredith says as we walk towards the hospital exit together. "We need to toast that incredible surgery," she insists, referring to a really tricky tumour I removed after six hours in theatre.

"Urgh, no," I reply, drowsily. "I am more than ready for my bed."

"Oh, come on!" She badgers me. "One little lime and soda," she encourages.

"Fine," I roll my eyes at her as she links her arm through mine and grins like the Cheshire cat.

...

_Teddy_  
"To Timothy Robbins," Nick says raising his beer at the bar. "And, how proud he'd be of his incredibly brave little sister."

"Oh, blah blah," Arizona says, in high spirits. "He was the brave one," she says with a genuine smile. "To Tim," she says, before we clink our bottles together.

"So, where are you working?" I ask Nick after our first gulps of beer.

"I got some work on the construction job in Pioneer Square," he explains.

"That's great, Nick," Arizona says like a proud little sister.

Then, we fall into casual conversation. We talk and laugh and reminisce about the old times. Nick supplies us with three rounds of drinks. Arizona's a little tipsy already. It's not surprising; she hasn't touched any alcohol for nine months. It's good to see her finally let loose. With Nick and I here with her, in this familiar environment, her old self is finally starting to shine through. The fun-loving, easy-going, sweet Arizona who doesn't have a care in the world.

"Oh my God, I love this song!" She says half-way through our third round, dragging us both onto the dancefloor that's already full of people.

_Meredith_  
When I enter Joe's, I see it's already filled with its regulars, including several people from the hospital. It's a little crowded tonight for my liking, but as long as there's space at the bar to sit and talk, I know I'll enjoy myself.

As we take two bar stools, I order our drinks, making sure Amelia's is non-alcoholic. As Joe makes them, I glance over at the dancefloor and nudge my sister-in-law.

"Look who's here," I say, nodding towards the woman she's so obviously crushing on. Arizona and another woman are being twirled around by a tall man with dark hair who I don't recognise. They're dancing and talking and laughing. She looks a lot happier than the last time I saw her.

_Amelia_  
Arizona looks incredible... glowing, in fact. Her long blonde hair is in loose curls, hanging just past her shoulders. Her bronzed cheeks and smoky eyeshadow accentuate her flawless facial features. The small bump leftover from her pregnancy is almost unnoticeable in the black leggings and baggy royal blue top she's wearing. Seeing her have such a good time with her friends gives me a feeling of happiness and hope. Hope that she can move on from this terrible year, and begin to live her life normally. When I catch her eye, I grin widely at her and she immediately makes her way over to us. The closer she gets, the prettier she looks.

"What are you doing here?" She asks with a smile and a hug.

"Apparently, we're celebrating," I answer with a hint of sarcasm as my lime and soda is placed in front of me.

"Amelia absolutely smashed this tricky surgery today," Meredith explains, taking the first sip of her colourful cocktail.

"You know you guys are _doctors_, right? Shouldn't you be celebrating somewhere a little... fancier?" She asks with a raised eyebrow before realising Joe is right behind us cleaning glasses. "No offence, Joe! Big fan of your work," she shouts over the bar. He simply rolls his eyes at the tipsy woman and throws her a familiar smile.

"We've been drinking here since we were interns, Robbins," I retort with a smirk. "This spot is like home to us."

"Yep," Meredith chips in. "A lot of memories have been made here," she says with a fond smile. This is where she met my brother.

"Round four, Phoenix?" The man she was dancing with before suddenly appears by her side. She grabs him by the arm and introduces us.

"This is Nick," she says, excitedly. "I've told you about Nick!"

"You have," I smirk at her slightly slurred sentences. "Nice to finally meet you," I say shaking his hand.

"Nick, this is Amelia," she explains. "And, this is Meredith."

"A pleasure ladies," he says, charmingly. "Can I get you both a drink?"

...

_Teddy_  
The five of us have managed to occupy one of the booths opposite the bar. Meredith's been bigging up Amelia's surgery and Nick's been telling us about how he secured his new job. There's been a lot of drinking and laughing and telling each other stories of how we're all connected.

There's been a lot of subtle touching, flirtatious laughter and stolen glances between my best friend and the woman next to her. It's so sweet to see.

"She likes her, huh?" Nick says quietly, referring to the sweet interaction between his oldest friend and the neurosurgeon. They're so involved in each other, that they don't even hear the conversation we're having.

"Oh, yeah!" I reply with a smirk.

"Amelia doesn't stop talking about her," Meredith adds.

All three of us share a knowing look before clinking our beer bottles together in a silent toast to our friends.


	11. Part 11

**Part Eleven**

_Teddy_  
"Can you come and look at this one?" Arizona shouts at me from her bedroom. I roll my eyes and go to look at the seventh outfit she's tried on so far. This one's a classic little black dress. It shows off her long, toned legs and the cut out parts of the dress that sit just above her hips highlight her skinny waist.

"You look hot, Zo!" I say, in an attempt to boost her low self-esteem. She's always had a little dent in her confidence, but definitely more so recently. "I can't believe all your baby weight has gone," I say, grabbing her waist in disbelief. "How did you do that in six weeks?" She simply shrugs at me.

"So... this one?" She asks, nervously, turning to look at herself in the mirror again.

"Uh huh, definitely that one," I nod. "Dressing to impress?"

"No!" She protests. I raise my eyebrow and smirk at her. We both full well know she wants to look sexy for Amelia. "I just don't want to look completely gross in front of Amelia's friends."

"As if you could ever look gross, Zo," I say, genuinely. "Plus, I don't think you could_ ever_ be gross in Amelia's eyes..." I throw my friend a wink and she sighs out, exasperated.

"Will you stop it with that?" She says, slapping me on the arm lightly. "I've told you a million times, we're friends!"

"Uh huh," I continue to smirk and it prompts an eyeroll from her.

"Shut up and help me do my hair," she replies, changing the subject very quickly.

...

_Arizona_  
Finally ready, Teddy and I make our way to the elevator at the end of the hallway. Pieces of curled hair that won't go into my low bun hang by the side of my face. Teddy did a good job with it.

"You should be working as a stylist instead of a stripper," I joke as I look at my hair in the elevator mirrors. I start to tweak little parts of it and she slaps my hands away. "Ow!"

"No messing!" She demands.

As the bell dings and the doors open to Amelia's floor, I fidget with the immaculately-wrapped gift box in my hands. I really hope she likes these gifts. What if she doesn't? Urgh.

"Zo," Teddy's voice startles me. "You alright?" She asks. That's when I realise my feet have stopped moving.

"Uh, yeah..." I say shaking my head back to reality. "Sorry," I say with a genuine smile.

Amelia's door is propped open, presumably so she doesn't have to go back and forth from the door to the terrace. Teddy's eyes widen as we make our way to the outdoor area.

"Holy shit!" She says, surprised by the penthouse. "Why don't we hang out _here_ more often?!"

I laugh at her reaction and start to look for Amelia. There's about thirty people here already, but the terrace could easily fit a few more people on. The music is just at the right volume. It's a great atmosphere filled with talking and laughter. When I spot Amelia, she's already making her way over to us in a sequined dress partially covered by a leather jacket.

"Oh my, God. You look incredible," she says as her eyes roam up and down my outfit. I can feel my cheeks already burning at the compliment.

"Ahem," Teddy clears her throat and does a full turn with her arms stretched out to the side, showing off the dusty pink bandeau dress she's wearing.

"You look great, too, Teddy," Amelia laughs.

"Um, this is for you," I say, awkwardly handing her the gift box. Too late to take it back now.

"Arizona, you shouldn't have," she says with the sweetest smile. Then she narrows her eyes. "It's not '30th' themed, is it?" She asks with mock disgust.

"No," I laugh. "I wouldn't dream of it," I say, playfully, holding my hands up.

"Come on, I'll introduce you to everyone," she says, placing a hand on the small of my back and leading us towards the closest group of doctors.

...

_Amelia_  
I've been mingling for a while now, nursing the only glass of champagne I'll be having all evening. Slow and steady, Amelia. Don't lose control.

As I look to my left, I notice that a slightly tipsy Teddy has got herself involved in a serious conversation with Owen. She hangs off his every word as he recounts tales of his time in the army. To my right, Meredith looks to be getting kind of cosy with Deluca. I find it weird. I find the idea of her with anyone who's not my brother weird.

I excuse myself from the group of friends I'm talking to and begin to search for a quieter spot on my terrace. I walk towards the half-wall, and see it's already occupied. Arizona seems quite content, leaning her forearms against it and staring into the distance, taking in the sights of Seattle. She lets the gentle breeze blow through her hair and occasionally takes a sip from the glass of wine she's holding. She looks serene, but in deep thought at the same time.

"Hey..." I stand next to her, mirroring her position. She gently smiles back at me.

"Are you feeling alright?" She asks. I look at her confused and she gestures to my glass.

"Oh! Yeah, fine," I say, smiling at her concern. "This is much classier than the stuff that used to get me hammered, believe me!" She smirks at my poor attempt at dark and twisty humour.

"You've got some great views up here," she says, casting her eyes back over Seattle.

"Yeah..." I whisper, staring at her and trying to figure out how someone can be so breathtakingly beautiful.

Then it hits me; I'm falling for her. I've been falling for her for months. Maybe since the moment I met her. How could anyone not? She's incredible.

I've fallen for the way the sun bounces off that golden hair and the way those eyes sparkle with intrigue. I've fallen for that enchanting smile and the way it makes her dimples pop. I've fallen for her kind heart and her witty sense of humour. And, her ambitious nature. And, her positive outlook. And, her bravery. And, her generosity. And, her intelligence. And, her curiosity.

And, and, and...

Oh, God... I'm in trouble.

"Did you open your gift?" She asks, motioning to the table that's full of boxes.

"Oh, uh... not yet!" I say, trying to suppress the blush that's creeping across my face as I stop my mind from listing all the reasons this woman is incredible. "You want me to?"

"Sure," she says with a quirky smile, not moving position. I reach for the beautiful gift box she brought up with her and begin to unwrap it, looking at her suspiciously. As I look down at the open box, my eyebrows shoot to my hairline. The first thing I see inside is a paper fortune teller, just like the one which helped me decide which college to go to. My mouth twitches into a sideways smirk as I remember that time in my life. There's some incredibly thoughtful stuff in here; loads of my favourite candy, a CD full of classical music to help me sleep, and a voucher for that Italian place I've been dying to try. The last gift I see is a framed picture of Arizona and I in Joe's bar. It's candid, so we're not looking at the camera. We're looking at each other and laughing... a lot. As I look at the picture, the butterflies in my stomach are going crazy.

I look up to see her staring at me in anticipation. She's left her wine glass balancing on the wall and she's unconsciously fidgeting with her hands. She needs reassurance that tells her she gave me the right gifts and that it doesn't matter that she doesn't have the money to buy expensive '30th birthday' themed crap. This stuff is worth so much more to me. I put the box to one side and pull her into a tight hug.

"They're so thoughtful," I say, pulling back to look at her but staying in our embrace. "Thank you," I say, earnestly.

"Oh, it's nothing really..." she says, beginning to blush.

Falling further...

"Arizona..." Her name falls from my mouth before I can stop myself.

"Mmm?" She murmurs, looking at me, contentedly.

"Uh... I... I was wondering..."

"Oh my God, Zo!" I'm interrupted by a slurring Teddy. Thank God! I don't actually know what I was about to say. "That guy... the hot one... the ginger guy," she says, wrapping an arm around Arizona's shoulders and pointing in the direction of a blissfully unaware Owen. "He was a medic in the army. That's what_ I'm_ going to do!" She explains as though she's never told Arizona this information before. "He's so interesting... and serious... but, handsome!"

"Okay, Teds," the beautiful blonde smirks at her friend. "Should we maybe get some water?"

"Hmm... Yeah," she decides, quickly.

...

_Arizona_  
I've just got Teddy home, and safely into her bed. She is going to have one hell of a hangover tomorrow. God knows why she got so hammered. Sure, we end up like this after a night out sometimes, but never after a casual event.

"You know what? You're the best," she says, aiming to tap me on the arm, but clumsily slapping the air instead.

"Okay, drunky," I laugh. "Goodnight," I say as I start to exit the room.

"Arizona," she says, quietly. I hate it when she uses my full name. It mostly means that something serious has happened or is about to happen. It makes me stop in my tracks. "I need to tell you something."

"What is it?" I ask, warily.

"The army called," she says, solemnly. Oh, fuck. I know what that means. But, I need her to confirm it for me.

"They did?" I ask, rhetorically. "And..."

"They have a job for me," she says, sadly. I don't understand her mood. This is what she's always wanted; to be the doctor who saves the lives of heroes. I don't get it.

"That's great," I say, enthusiastically. I grab her hand in support. Maybe she's just in shock. "Just what you wanted, right?" She nods at my question but doesn't say anything. "When, uh- when do you start?"

"I start training tomorrow and leave in two weeks," she says, tears starting to form in her eyes. "Nick said he's gonna come and stay here a while."

"You told Nick before you told me?" I ask, shocked and, I must admit, a little upset that I wasn't the first person she told. "When did you find out?"

"That a job was coming up? A couple of months ago... I found out my departure date about a week ago," she explains.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I whisper, tears forming in my own eyes as I wait for her answer.

"Because... because this year's been shit for you, Zo!" She says through tears that have started to roll freely. "And, now I'm leaving. I'm leaving to go to a place where I know you're going to worry about me every single day." She sobs out in a mixture of sadness and intoxication. "And... And... The thought of having to break this news to you... It was unbearable."

"But, Teds... I support you in every way," I say, rushing my best friend into a hug. "You _have_ to know that... You _do_ know that, right?"

"Yeah, of course... I just..." she sighs out, trying to regain some sort of control over her emotions. "I want you to be okay," she says, cupping my cheek.

"Teddy... I'm gonna be fine," I say, convincingly.

"You sure?" She sniffs.

"Yeah, I'm sure," I say, with a smile and a light punch to the arm, before pulling her into another hug. "You don't have to worry about me," I say, quietly. "Just focus on those soldiers and coming home safe."

...

_Amelia_  
"Hey," I say to Arizona as I let myself into her apartment the next morning. She's lay out across the couch, a blanket draped over her, probably recovering from a hangover. "Hangover cure," I say, holding up a dish full of leftover food from the party.

"Thanks," she says, sitting up and making room for me. I plonk myself on the opposite side of the couch.

"Teddy still in bed?" I ask, looking around.

"Oh... no," Arizona says, distracted. "She's out."

"Have you sent off your Hopkins application yet?" I ask her for the seventeenth time this week. I sound like a broken record, but this woman has such little confidence in herself I worry that if I didn't nag her constantly she'd never send it.

"This morning," she says, vacantly. "I doubt I'll hear anything, it's so late in the year to be applying..."

"You never know," I say with a shrug. "Loads of people drop out before they even get there... Plus, some people decide to defer a year."

"Mmm," she says, her mind wandering.

"Everything okay?" I ask, concerned by how little the usual chatterbox is giving to our conversation.

"Um... T-Teddy..." She stutters. "Teddy has a new job... in the army."

"She does?" I ask with a grin. "She must be over the moon!"

"She is," Arizona whispers, beginning to nibble her bottom lip. She's terrified. I can see it in her eyes.

"She'll be fine," I say, comfortingly stroking one of Arizona's arms. "She'll be better than fine... She's been dreaming of this for years!"

"I know," she says as a sob gets caught in her throat.

"Oh, hey... Come here..." I pull her into the best hug I can, and I feel her silent tears leak through my shirt. Then she utters a sentence that breaks my heart.

"I've already lost my brother... I can't lose my sister, too."

...

_Teddy_  
My training came and went in a blur. Now, it's time for me to leave. It's 3:27am and I'm sitting on a bench in the fairly empty Sea-Tac airport with my best friend next to me, waiting for the monitors to reveal my gate. Her head is leaning against my shoulder in tiredness. I'm also getting a little apprehension from her. It's apparent she doesn't want me to go, but she'll never admit it. She wants what's best for me. And, I want what's best for her. It's just how it's always worked with us.

An intruding voice suddenly announces the gate number for my flight. I sigh out and pat Arizona's knee.

"Well, that's me..." I say as we both stand up.

"You all set?" She asks me, nervously.

"Yeah," I say, quietly. I look at my luggage then back to her. We share this weird kind of sad smile and a look that declares nothing more needs to be said. We step into an embrace and I immediately feel her little body tremble slightly.

"You have to come back," she whispers in my ear.

"I will... I promise."


	12. Part 12

**Part Twelve**

_Amelia_  
A loud, relentless banging noise is what's woken me up. As I blink my eyes open I realise the sound is coming from my front door. Disorientated, I throw my sheets back and clumsily walk to greet the noisy visitor.

"Alright, alright!" I shout as I get closer to the door. With my eyes half-open, I pull down on the handle and reveal the offensive noise-maker. "Arizona?" I ask as though I don't recognise my friend in her messy bun and pyjamas.

"I need you to open this for me!" She says, urgently, waving an envelope in the air before shoving it into my hands.

"What?" I ask, rubbing my eyes. I fumble with the letter before looking at her. "What is this?"

"Look at the stamp," she says, frantically.

I do as she asks and notice a familiar logo; the letter is from Hopkins. My eyes widen and I look up at her and see her nervously chewing her lip.

"Okay, let's sit down," I say, calmly, motioning to the couch. We sit down, but her body is stiff and she's looking at me, alertly. "_You_ should open it," I say, holding out the envelope for her to take.

"I... I can't," she says, shakily, pushing it back in my direction.

"Hey..." I take her hand and she looks at me, terrified of what the envelope contains. "No matter what it says... you should be incredibly proud of yourself, you know that?" I say, honestly. She says nothing, but looks back to the letter and gently takes it from my hands. She gives me a nervous smile and her fingers fidget at the edge of the envelope. She stands up suddenly and starts pacing the area in front of me. I follow and stop her movements, quickly. "Open it," I say with a reassuring smile.

She sighs out, and uses her trembling fingers to tear it open. There's a moment's hesitation before she unfolds the letter containing her fate.

"_Dear Miss Robbins_," she begins to read out loud. "_Thank you for your application to The Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine._" A laugh of disbelief escapes her throat. "_I am delighted to inform you that you have been accepted onto the M.D. program commencing September 3rd._" I feel a large smile spread across my face as I look at her. "I got in?" She whispers, lifting her head to reveal the tears in her eyes.

"You got in!" I confirm, grabbing her arms in excitement. With the letter, still clutched in one of her hands, she launches herself at me and wraps her arms around my neck. Her body shakes as she bursts into happy tears. I hold her close, trying to soothe the overwhelming feelings that must be coursing through her body.

"Thank you," she whispers as she becomes a little calmer.

"Hey, don't thank me," I say, pulling back and wiping her tears. "You earned this," I say, honestly. "I just helped a little along the way."

"You helped _a lot_," she emphasises. "I couldn't have done it without you," she says, gratefully.

"Don't sell yourself short," I say, a blush creeping its way up the back of my neck. "You're intelligent, and compassionate, and born to be a surgeon," I say, earnestly. "In fact, they'll be lucky to have you!" It's her turn to blush now, her eyes darting to the floor, but a smile remaining on her face. "When do you start?" I ask, changing the subject.

"Uh... September 3rd..." She says, checking the letter. "Oh, my God, that's three weeks away!" She says, her eyes wide. "I need to find somewhere to live!"

"Don't worry about that right now," I say, calmly. "I'll help you find somewhere later. For now, just take time to revel in it... You got in!"

"Oh, my God! I really did..." She says, as though it's starting to sink in for her. "I've got to tell Nick!"

"Nick's in?" I ask with a raised eyebrow. "You woke me before you woke Nick?"

"I wanted to find out with you," she says so sweetly that my heart immediately melts. "We need to celebrate!" She exclaims before kissing my cheek. "I'll call you later," she says before leaving.

And, as she closes the door behind her, my smile begins to fade as I come to terms with the fact that she's moving across the country.

...

_Arizona_  
"Baltimore?" Nick asks again, his eyebrows knitted together. "You're moving to _Baltimore_?"

"Yeah," I breathe out over the table. I've taken him to his favourite breakfast place in an attempt to ease the blow. I know he'll be ecstatic for me, but I also know he's going to worry about me being by myself in a new city.

"Who's going to look after you in _Baltimore_?" He says, his worry stamped across his face.

"Nick, in case you haven't noticed, I am 24 years-old..." I joke. "I've kinda learned how to look after myself."

"You know what I mean," he replies, brushing past my comments. "Who's going to look out for you?"

He's being the big brother; he feels responsible for my wellbeing and has this urge to protect me at all costs. It's a role Tim took on all those years ago when we were taken from our negligent parents. When Tim died, it flipped some sort of mechanism within Nick. He checked in with me as often as possible and swore to watch over me in the same ways that Tim did.

When I told him about the rape, I knew he'd feel like a failure. As I retold the story, I could see it in his eyes. I had to force myself to tell him the whole story because I hated the emotional pain it caused him. The guilt I saw on his face was almost unbearable. He felt as though he failed to protect me. But, how could he? He wasn't to know this would happen to me. No one could have known.

"Hey," I say, quietly, grabbing one of his strong arms with both of my hands. "If I need anyone, I know who to call, okay?" He needs this reassurance; this little notion just to say I still trust him to be my protector... An acknowledgement that I still see him as my big brother.

"It's a long way away," he says, his mouth twitching to the side.

"I know," I say, gently. "But, I... God, Nick, I used to go to sleep _dreaming_ about this," I smile, genuinely. "This is all I've ever wanted since I was a kid," I explain, though he already knows. "I need to help people. I need to_ save_ people," I elaborate. "And, I want to learn how to do that from the most innovative and brilliant minds in the country."

Finally, he sighs out and covers both of my hands with one of his, smiling at me, quirkily.

"You're gonna be amazing, Flagstaff."


	13. Part 13

**Part Thirteen**

_Arizona_  
The last three weeks have disappeared even sooner than I thought they would. September has arrived and I'm ready. My cases are packed, I've bought my medical books and I've found a house share in Baltimore with a few other Med students. I've even found a new roommate for Nick. That apartment has seen so many people come and go this past year. My flight is booked and I take off at twelve o' clock tomorrow.

What I'm not prepared for is leaving this place... Leaving these people. I feel like I've only just got Nick back. And, the prospect of leaving Amelia... I can't even think about it. We're in Joe's and though I'm surrounded by many different friends from many different areas of my life, I can't take my eyes off her. Her hair has been curled into a mane that hangs past her shoulders and she's wearing this red dress that contrasts perfectly against her pale skin.

"Okay, guys... I want to make a toast!" Nick announces, cutting through the conversation and laughter happening around the table and surrounding areas. "To Arizona Robbins, the woman who's about to become the greatest surgeon the world has ever seen." I roll my eyes at his over-exaggeration but feel a nudge to my ribs. It's Amelia, giving me a look that tells me she concurs.

"Here, here," she chimes in. Glasses are clinked around the table and sips are taken. "Oh, Mer's here," she says, motioning to her sister-in-law and a few other doctors who have just walked in. "Let me just go say 'hi'," she says, leaving the table.

My eyes follow her across the room as she joins her group of friends. As she talks to them her smile radiates throughout the dingy bar. Her blue eyes, accented by smoky eyeshadow, have this gleam in them that's simply Amelia.

My_ friend_, Amelia. Cut it out, Arizona. You're friends with this woman... is what you tell yourself constantly. Yet, more and more you catch yourself thinking about how beautiful she is... How she makes your worst days better, and your good days incredible. You find yourself giddy over her quirks and longing to spend time with her even after you've spent the whole day together.

"So, are you going to tell her how you feel before you leave, or...?" Nick's comments snap me out of my thoughts.

"Which is what exactly?" I ask, playing dumb.

"Couldn't possibly say..." He smirks at me before sipping from a bottle of beer. Before I have a chance to reply, a couple of the girls from the club pull me onto the dancefloor, saying things like, 'Oh, my God! This is our song!' and 'Show us those moves, Robbins!'

_Amelia_  
I'm constantly glancing over at Arizona and the conversation with my friends from work has become background noise. Surely, I'm becoming obvious. But, I can't help it. As always, she looks stunning. As I watch her dancing and laughing and having fun with her friends, there's a tight feeling in my chest. Obviously, I'm excited for her and beyond proud that she's about to live out her dream. But, I also feel sad that she's leaving her current life behind. Even more so, I'm struggling to cope with the idea that I'm not always going to see that smile that makes my life a little better every time I see it.

"I, uh... I'm gonna take off," I excuse myself from the group, clutching my bag under my arm. "I'm kinda tired," I lie.

"You want me to walk you home?" Hunt asks, courteously.

"No, thanks," I smile. "See you later, guys," I say, before quickly exiting the bar.

...

About ten minutes later, I'm back in my apartment. I close my door and lean against it, releasing a breath I didn't realise I was holding. I squeeze my eyes together tightly, ensuring the tears that are stinging my eyes don't roll down my cheeks. When I feel ready to move, I force myself over to the couch and throw myself on it. Then, my phone buzzes. It's Arizona.

_Hey! Did you leave? You didn't say goodbye. Is everything okay? xx_

I smile at the concern in the text. She's so sweet. I begin typing back.

_Yeah, sorry! I was feeling a little off. Enjoy the rest of your night. I'll see you in the morning xx_

...

Half an hour later and I'm curled up on the couch watching reruns of _Friends_, still donning the dress I wore to the bar. I can't be bothered to get changed yet, but the black heels I was wearing have been shoved under the couch. Suddenly, I hear a knock at my door and wonder who could possibly be calling round at 11pm.

I open the door and there stands Arizona in the same white dress she was wearing in Joe's, hair a little dishevelled but perfect.

"Hey... What are you doing here?" I ask as she strolls into my apartment.

"Are you okay? Are you sick?" She asks with concern in her voice.

"What? No, I'm fine," I reply confused.

"It's just... you left kinda quickly," she says, her puppy dog eyes on full display. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah..." I pause, wondering whether or not I should tell her the truth. With it being her last night here, I guess I've got nothing to lose by being honest. "Just... kinda sad," I admit. "I am so, _so_ proud of you," I say, steeping in front of her and taking her hands in mine. "But, I am going to miss you... so much."

"I'm going to miss you, too," she says, croakily. We share a sad smile before falling into an embrace. "Thanks for always saving me," she whispers into my ear. And, everything she's been through in the past year... everything we've been through together, hits me like a lightening bolt. I wrap my arms tighter around her waist, pulling her in as close as possible.

"You've never needing saving," I reply, earnestly. "You're one of the strongest people I know."

I lean back to look at her, but can't seem to let her go. When she looks at me with those eyes I know so well, everything stops. My mind quietens. I'm calm and still. And, everything seems so clear. A natural force pulls me towards her until my lips are pressed against hers in a quick but perfect kiss. Her head shoots back in surprise, but her arms remain around my neck. She looks at me again; everything calm, everything still. She says nothing, suggesting she feels it, too. Her hands move to my shoulders, then rest on my cheeks. She initiates the second kiss, gently, tilting back to check my reaction. There's a third, then a fourth... then many more. I'm not sure who's leading these kisses, but what I do know is that I'm becoming lost in Arizona Robbins, already. When I deepen the kiss, I feel her hands tangle into my hair. Electricity runs through my entire body. Then, we stop... We stop because we need to breathe. Her forehead rests against mine as we fight to get the air back into our lungs.

"Should... should we stop?" I ask through laboured breaths, head overtaking heart.

"No," she breathes out simply, launching back into another heart-stopping kiss.

Before I can even register what's happening, her legs are wrapped around my waist and I'm carrying her through to the bedroom, never once breaking the incredible kiss.

_Arizona_  
Amelia gently lays me on the luxurious sheets covering her bed, her body never leaving mine. Her lips move from my mouth to my neck and I pull her closer.

Then, I feel a hand travel up my thigh and under my dress.

A number of horrifying images enter my mind. I relive the feeling of Cohen's rough movements and his unwanted contact. I try to shake the images from my head. I try to stay in the present, stay with Amelia, but I'm finding it impossible. More flashbacks: being forcefully undressed, underwear being violently torn away from me. My stomach flips and I feel tears sting my eyes.

Suddenly, the contact freezes. The hand stops and the kissing stops. Then, I realise the reason it's stopped is because one of my trembling hands has grabbed her wrist. The beautiful woman on top of me looks at me, not with the abhorrent sympathy most people would give rape victims, but with complete and utter care and understanding.

"Hey... it's me," she says, gently. "I'm not gonna hurt you," she whispers, reassuringly, using her elbow to steady herself and tucking my hair behind my ear with her free hand. "We can stop... If you want to... If you need to... we can stop... Now, or at any time."

I look at her tentatively and know she's not lying to me. But, I don't want to stop. Not tonight. Not with her. With her, I don't ever want this to stop.

"I'm okay," I whisper. "I just... I need a second."

"Take all the time you need," she says, and I know she means it. I'm safe with Amelia.

"Thank you," I smile, cupping one of her cheeks. She closes her eyes and leans into the contact. That's when I loosen the grip I have around her wrist and pull her down into another kiss. I tug at her dress, indicating I want it off of her as soon as possible. She kneels up and pulls it up and over her head, dropping it to the side of the bed. My lips become dry as I look at her incredible body covered only by her black bra and underwear. My tongue darts out to wet them again and she pulls me into a sitting position. Carefully, she reaches around and undoes the zip at the back of my dress, her fingers leaving a trail of goose bumps down my bare spine.

"This okay?" She whispers as my dress drops down to my waist, revealing my breasts. I nod in response and she helps me shimmy the rest of the way out of the unwanted piece of clothing. Then, we're back to our original position, me on my back and our mouths exploring one another once more. "You... are so... beautiful," she tells me in between kisses. And, I believe her. She's making me feel beautiful. For the first time in a long time, I feel desirable. I don't feel dirty or ashamed or helpless. In this moment, she's freed me of all that.

My body arches into hers as her hands softly wander up and down my torso, brushing over erect nipples before gliding down to my hips. I subtly unhook her bra to even the score and she begins to kiss down my stomach. She delicately loops her fingers around the seam of my underwear and I lift my ass slightly so she can pull them off.

_Amelia_  
I try to get my breath back, but when you're looking at a completely naked Arizona Robbins, it's not possible. She is truly beautiful in every sense of the word.

As I kiss my way down her thigh, I feel her quiver in anticipation. Her breath hitches in her throat and I feel my own desire start to run down my leg. No one has ever turned me on this easily before. I drag my tongue along the crease between her thigh and her hip, and hear the most wonderful moan from her. I make sure my movements are slow, but deliberate, in an attempt to reassure her that what I said still stands; if she needs to stop, we stop.

"Wait," I hear her breathe out. My head shoots up to look at her, putting all of my attention on what she needs to say. When she's silent, I make my way back up her body.

"You okay?" I ask, quietly, brushing her cheek with my fingertips.

"I don't want to stop," she says, through laboured breaths. "I just... Can you... can you stay up here? Stay with me?" She stutters. Her eyes are pleading with me. I smile at her and kiss her with such passion that she knows the answer.

We become tangled in each other once again. As I run my fingers back down her torso, one of her hands clings to my bicep, the other tangles in my hair. When I start to manipulate her clit with my middle finger, she breaks the kiss and gasps out for air. The wetness I find there stimulates a further wanting within me. My lips move to her neck and I speed my movements up a little. I'm rewarded with the most erotic moans falling from Arizona's mouth. I lean up a little so I can reposition my hand, but I stay as close to her as possible. I start to circle the walls around her opening, as though asking permission. Her look of pure yearning tells me all I need to know. Slowly, I glide two fingers into her, and she moans loudly as I graze her G-spot. I ensure that each push inside her is smooth and pleasurable. She tilts her head up to lean her forehead against mine, and her body reacts to my motions in the most heavenly way.

I get lost in her... Her movements, the sounds coming out of her mouth, the wonderful scent of her perfume... All of it. I could stay here forever. With her.


	14. Part 14

**Part Fourteen**

_Amelia_  
When I wake up the next morning, I'm alone. I look at the clock that reads 6:34am and scrunch my eyebrows together. She definitely hasn't gone to the airport yet. Then, as I look through my window, I realise there's a goddess standing on my terrace. She has nothing but a sheet wrapped around her. It drops a little, revealing her slender back.

As I stare at her, I'm hit by the most graphic sex flashbacks; her hands tenderly exploring my curves, her lips leaving goose bumps with every sweet kiss, the desire in her eyes when she realised how turned on I was. My heart leaps into my mouth as I remember the way she touched me and the incredibly intense orgasms that followed after.

I rub my eyes and throw back the sheets, reaching for the thin robe hanging from my door and wrapping it tightly to my body before heading towards Arizona. As I get closer to her, the smell of cigarette smoke fills my nostrils and I notice the small stick dangling in her right hand. Regardless, I wrap my arms around her from behind and she automatically leans back into me. I press my lips against her beautifully sunkissed shoulder before resting my chin in that spot.

"Good morning," I whisper.

"Hey," she replies, huskily, before taking another drag of her cigarette.

"You're smoking," I state.

"Thanks," she says, cockily. I can't see her face, but I can tell she's smirking. And, actually, I love it. I love that she has the confidence to reply with something like that.

"No, I mean... you're _smoking_," I say through a quiet laugh, indicating to the butt she's just stubbed out. "I've never seen you smoke before."

"I smoke when I'm stressed, or when I've had a run-in with an authority figure..." she turns in my arms and rests her hands on my shoulders. "Or, when I'm sad," she admits.

"You shouldn't be sad," I say, tucking her hair behind her ear. "This is a good day, remember," I reassure her, though I think completely differently. I can't bear the thought of her going now.

"Amelia," she breathes out, uneasily. "Last night... well, did it... did it feel... weird to you?" She asks, furrowing her brow. "I mean, we've been friends for so long... It should've felt weird..."

"No," I shake my head. "It felt... right," I reply, honestly. Why not? I've got nothing to lose right now. "In fact, I kind of can't believe we haven't been doing this the whole time."

"Thank God it wasn't just me," she replies with a sad smile. She places a short kiss on my lips, then leans her forehead against mine. I swallow down the lump in my throat. "I'm gonna be gone for a really long time," she reminds me.

"I know," I say, plainly, my mouth twitching to the side as I try to control my emotions. "But..." I sigh out. "You're going to do amazing things, Arizona Robbins."

...

_Arizona_  
We sit together, Amelia and I, on a bench in Sea-Tac Airport, waiting for my gate to be called. We'd arranged weeks ago that she would drive me to the airport, but obviously I had no idea that anything was going to happen between us before then. I dropped my luggage off a while ago, so I have nothing to distract myself with. I fidget nervously with my hands, searching my head for the right words to say to the wonderful woman next to me.

There's so much I want to tell her, but I'm terrified to say it. Now really isn't the time. I'm about to leave for three years. Three years, _at least_. Who says I'd leave after Med school? Hopkins might want me to do my residency there. I might build a life there. I might _love_ my life there. I might stay for years after... It's just all so unclear right now.

We're never going to be able to visit each other... Not with the way our schedules are going to run. For that same reason, keeping in touch is going to be tricky... Finding a time when we're both free to call each other or even text? It's going to be near impossible.

Suddenly, I'm comforted by a soft warm hand over both of mine. I stop fidgeting and look up to see Amelia smiling at me, soothingly. She says nothing, but the look she's giving me speaks volumes. I rest my head on her shoulder and I feel her wrap an arm around me. I close my eyes when I feel her kiss my forehead, soaking up this feeling of safety one last time.

_Amelia_  
"_Attention, passengers. Flight 746 to Baltimore will be departing from Gate 3..._" comes over the tannoy. The rest of the announcement falls on deaf ears as I realise that's Arizona's flight. There's a feeling of despair in the pit of my stomach. She's about to leave. For a very long time. Maybe forever.

"That's... that's me," she says, quietly. She slings her bag over her shoulder and holds the straps with both hands as we stand.

We face each other, silently. Her eyes dart to the floor and her mouth opens and closes a couple of times, as though she wants to say something, but can't find the right words. I hate seeing her this nervous and unsure of herself.

"Come here," I say, pulling her into an embrace. She clings to me, and I take the opportunity to absorb her; the smell of her vanilla shampoo and cocoa butter moisturiser blending together, her soft cheek pressed into mine, the perfect weight and warmth of her body against me. I have to close my eyes to stop the tears.

"Don't forget about me," she whispers, pleadingly. And, I can't hold it back any more. I exhale sharply as the first tears roll down my cheeks. As if I could ever forget her.

"Impossible," I reply, before pulling back and checking on my friend. Her own cheeks are stained with tears and I can't help but thumb them away. "Text me when you land, okay?" I say, giving her my best smile.

"I will," she promises. She places a hand on one of my cheeks and leaves a sweet kiss on the other. "Bye," she whispers with a smile.

"Bye," I whisper back, as she turns and leaves.

_Arizona_  
As I walk away, I let the rest of the tears stream down my cheeks. I feel bottom lip wobble and have to take a couple of breaths through my mouth to remain silent. I can't look back. If I look back, I won't be able to take another step. I won't be able to get on that plane. I won't be able to leave her.

_Amelia_  
Watching her walk away makes me feel physically sick. The feelings I'm experiencing are overwhelming. I have to spit it out. She's not going to hear me. But, I need to say it out loud.

Something I could never say to her face...

"I love you."

...

**The End(?)**


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